Be kind and take care of them.
We have all grown up listening and witnessing realistic facts like nothing lasts forever, death is inevitable and so forth. All those words seem as random as the morning coffee you drink before heading out for work. Pause for a moment here and think what happens when you miss that morning coffee.
Your head aches; you get anxious thinking of how you would have to drink the stale one in a dull white Styrofoam cup at your workplace… and the list goes on. Something or someone you think is always going to be there for you, much like a step in the stair – when it is not there anymore, it comes as a shock now doesn’t it? The lilac colors in the sky are still lingering there, but with a heavy sense of loss impeding your head and heart, you barely notice those colors.
In the same pretext, losing someone is a very tough reality to face for most of us. When you see someone lose someone they love, it feels like you’ve lost a small part of that person too, a part which only existed with the one they have lost.
Helping them in such a case in any way you can, offering full time support to them and basically doing everything you can for them might not bring back who they have lost nor stitch their broken pieces together. But it might as well give them fair and solid ground to reinvent themselves. After all, every destruction breeds creations.
The sparks of death and the seeming ending it represents is not the end of the chapter, but the beginning of a new one. So why not be there to help them write their stories by a few tokens of support and affection given during their tough times?
Here are a few main things to remember when it comes to dealing your loved ones when they loss someone they love:
Don’t keep reminding them time heals all wound – they are already aware of it.
At the time you’re grieving, that heavy sense of loss – which lies in the present – is all you can think of in the heat of the moment. The future or the past really doesn’t matter in that moment. Everyone keeps reminding you time will heal all your wounds and make you used to the pain… later.
Yet what really feels bothersome is the fact that no one can seem to tell you exactly how to cope with it all right now. This is what you really wish to know. Why now? Because it’s right now you can’t sleep and eat; feel their presence and can do nothing but cry. Remember this when dealing with someone’s who’s grieving.
Don’t remind them that time heals, but that you’re there for them right now, that you love them, that they have you to lean on and that they aren’t going through this alone.