Even the strongest relationships can be brought down within seconds if some things keep happening again and again. The strongest of lovers have their limits and they can only support one another to a certain level before the "spark" goes away. Here are six things that can ruin a perfect relationship.
6. Letting negative feelings boil up
A relationship that is completely devoid of any conflict is close to impossible. It’s only natural for negative feelings to arise when you are spending so much of your time with another individual. Keeping these feelings inside, and letting them simmer and boil just leads to even more resentment. Your partner is supposed to be someone you can open up to completely, someone you can talk to about anything and everything, so don’t hesitate to talk to them about any negative feelings that may arise and if you feel like they aren’t someone you can do that with then maybe you need to rethink and reevaluate your relationship. Also, be tactful about how you communicate the negative feelings to them.
They might be very understanding but being too blunt with them may lead to them being hurt. Try to have these conversations face to face with them, don’t talk to them about these things on text. An emoji can’t convey emotion as well as you can and your texts might come off as colder and more offhandish than you meant them to be. Another good idea would be to turn to your best friend and discuss how you can bring up those negative feelings with your partner.
It might even help you in opening up to your partner and get you warmed up for a talk with them. If you are in it for the long haul, then doubt will be something that will bug you from time to time, instead of hiding it from your partner, talk about it so that they can reassure you and vice versa. It is unbelievable how comforting a simple, ‘ Don’t worry, I’ll always be with you’ can be.
Always remember to talk about the negativities as soon as you feel them. Don't keep them in your head for too long or they'll keep developing into bigger issues that'll come out later and when they come out, you and your partner will have a bad time. So it's always better to keep an open level of communication and to never keep anything that's bothering you hidden from your partner.
5. Letting yourself go
Most people, when they get into a relationship are so obsessed with making it work that they absolutely forget about their wellbeing and focus completely on their partner. This type of self sacrificing behavior is not good for you or your relationship. Self love is one of the most important things ever; both for one’s self esteem and for mental well being. Letting yourself go means not focusing on building yourself up as an individual and this can be extremely detrimental to your love life.
Talk to your partner and work out some ‘ME’ time for yourself. Don’t be afraid that your partner might react negatively to it; it’s very likely that they may need it just as much as you do. Take some time off your relationship to work on yourself. Have a spa day or find a hobby which helps in developing you as an individual. You don’t have to do everything with your partner.
Dragging them to your friends party may seem like a great idea but it’s not; a) they may not want to be there and would so much rather that you enjoy yourself there while they have some quiet time at home, b) your friends may not like having them around all the time and that can ruin your friendships and leave you isolated. Being the martyr for your relationship will just make you bitter and will affect how you interact with your partner.
Letting yourself go will lower your self esteem and you will project that onto your partner and ruin your relationship with them. One of the main reasons that a lot of perfect relationships get ruined is because people lose themselves in the relationship, then one day they wake up and realize that they don’t know who they are; things just go downhill from there. Your partner loves you and they want the best for you. They don’t want you to ruin your health for their sake.
Your relationship is as healthy as you are, you can't give all of your attention to your partner and let yourself go in the process. Not only is your partner not going to be okay with it but you'll slowly start feeling worse and worse about yourself and your well-being. Remember, you can't love anyone until you completely love yourself first. Love begins with you.