‘Disagreements don’t cause disunity, a lack of forgiveness does’
– Loren Cunningham
The only way to not argue with someone is to keep away from the difficult conversations. But, difficult as they may be, they are equally important. You might not like what you both have to say about it, and furthermore, might be on a completely different page than each other. The thing to understand is that you don’t have to agree with each other, but you have to accept each other’s opinions at all costs. Don’t ruin a good thing over disagreements. Even if you’re not so good at dealing with them delicately, here are a few things that could help you;
They’re both accountable
Don’t be placing blames on each other for everything that ever goes wrong. It takes two to make things work, but at the same time, it also takes two to ruin them. Whatever it is, you’re both in it together and you’re both responsible for it. Only when you take responsibility for your relationship, you’ll be able to rise above any differences you have and try working things out.
They both want to work it out, in the best possible way
So there are a couple of ways you could do this. Firstly, you could act oblivious to the whole thing and never talk about it, and if your partner brings it up, you talk yourself out of it. Secondly, hold them responsible for the mess you’re both in and act the victim. Finally, work through it, maturely.
The first one would lead to repressed emotions, frustration and anger, which would inevitably erupt like a volcano at the worst possible time. The second one again is going to do more bad than good. That leaves the third one, which is in fact the best available option. If you want to make it last, you’re both going to have to make a few sacrifices. Talk it out. Be as patient and understanding as you can be of each other. Your choice of words and even the tone of your voice can make a tremendous difference.