So she won’t keep setting herself on fire only to make sure that you’re warm enough. She won’t keep running after you only to realize that she’s running after something that isn’t even hers anymore. She won’t keep changing her entire personality just to fit your ideal of the perfect girl. And one day, you might just understand why she decided to stop, why she decided to change, and why she decided to finally leave. But until that day, this chapter of her life has come to a halt.
You lie there again, breathing lightly with your head on her chest, indifferent once again to the rampage of emotions running inside her heart. This isn’t anything new. It’s just the aftermath of another petty fight, an argument that could have easily been avoided, a disagreement that should have just been ignored.
You knew the things that would hurt her most. You knew all about her weaknesses, her vulnerabilities, her flaws. And you didn’t stop yourself once from using all of them against her. You used cruel words to convey your anger. You said things that should never have been uttered, things you can’t ever take back and things that you probably won’t even remember an hour from now. And you end up reconciling once again. But even less fully than the last time this happened.
How could you act so indifferent? How could you let her fall asleep without making sure she didn’t feel so hurt and broken after the fight? How could you let all her tears fall in the darkness of the night? How could you ignore all the things that were so obviously wrong with this relationship? And after all that’s been said and done, you still managed to convince yourself that the change in her was something that happened overnight, something that couldn’t have been stopped, and something that probably had nothing to do with the way you treated her.
Do you remember the very beginning when you would do everything in your power just to see that beautiful smile on her face once, when you would worry like crazy at the slightest change in her mood, when the thought of her crying would actually make your heart hurt? And here you are today- two strangers who were once madly, truly and deeply in love with each other.- Continue reading on the next page