I hope one day I can know how it feels to always be a part of someone’s thoughts. To be the last voice they want to hear at night before they fall asleep and to be the first face they want to see when they wake up in the morning. To be the first person they will call when they hear good news and the first person they want to hug when something in life goes wrong. To be the one they want to spend all their weekends with and the one they want to return home to after a tiring day at work.
I hope one day I can know what it feels like to actually get my hopes up without a constant fear and dread that they’ll come crashing down in the next instant. To have plans with a guy that he’ll actually show up to, plans that will be more important to him than a night out with his boys, plans that he will actually look forward to and not just see as an obligation.
I hope one day I can know what it feels like to be kissed when you least expect it. To get a reassuring hug from behind when you’re surrounded with work. To look deep into someone’s eyes and realize how truly lucky you are. To be perceived as someone who can be more than just a temporary infatuation or a one-night stand. To be told that there’s no one else they’d rather be with than you, today and forever.
I hope one day I can know how it feels to actually listen to the truth instead of well-crafted and clever lies- lies that leave you questioning your own sanity. To look into somebody’s eyes and be sure of the fact that you aren’t being fooled, that you won’t be a matter of ridicule when he tells his friends about the way he played you, that you aren’t being deceived into believing that he’s a good guy . To know that the person I’m with is actually worth all the time and efforts I’m placing.
I hope one day I can know how it feels when a person actually tries their best to place a smile on my face, when they make silly jokes just to make me laugh, when they surprise me with my favorite chocolates just because I’m having a bad day, when they fight the entire world only to be with me and when they make sure I’m aware of just how much I mean to them. I’m done with always being the person who cares more. The person who loves more. I hope one day I can see how it feels when someone finally cares for me as much as I care for them. I hope I can see how it feels when all your emotions and feelings are actually reciprocated, instead of being ignored.
I hope one day I can know how it feels to wait for a text with patience and understanding. To be content in knowing that it will eventually come, even if it takes an hour or more. To not freak out about why they haven’t called. To not have any doubts about the fact that they’re always thinking of me. To be confident in the fact that they really are busy, and aren’t just using that as an excuse to ignore me.
I hope one day I can know how it feels to be shown off to everyone around. To be introduced to people as his girlfriend, instead of being introduced everywhere as just a friend. To be the one they can’t ever stop talking about. To be described as the most beautiful and talented girl he’s ever seen.
I hope one day I can know how it feels to be sure of someone’s feelings for me. To know exactly where our relationship stands. I don’t want to keep playing all these mind games. I don’t want to be left guessing all the time. I want them to be straight with me, to tell me every single thing that’s been on their mind. I want them to let me know if they actually want a serious and long-lasting relationship with me. I want them to promise me that I won’t be the only one fighting for us.
I hope one day I can know how it feels to be loved in the way I always deserved to be loved. To be told that I’m stunning by someone who wouldn’t ever lie. To know that I’ve finally found the person who won’t ever let me cry, the person who won’t ever hurt me, and the person who will actually treat me like their top priority.