Sorry, you’ve lost your chance, I’m going to move forward in life without you.
We were perfect, or so I thought. We were not perfect! I was naïve. I was dumb enough to put my faith in all of your words. The words you never meant.
Your promises held no value, they were as empty as your words. You made me feel secure by giving me a commitment when you never planned to see it through. Well, I blame myself a little too because deep down, I always knew that you are not healthy for me and I will end up getting hurt. I did not listen to my mind and chose to follow my heart.
Yes, there were many signs, there were many instances where I should have walked away but I chose to forgive you every time and welcomed you back with open arms. I accepted you unconditionally with both the good things and the bad. In return, I only asked for your companionship and constant consideration. Instead, you played my hot and cold without ever caring about how your actions affected me.
I was always last in your list of priorities. I suffered, I adapted and I compromised even though I knew that this person isn’t me. Why did I do all that for you? Because I was imprudent enough to fall in love with you in the first place.
What made me hate myself more was the fact that for a long time I wanted you to return. I wanted the possible future that we had planned together. For a while, I missed you. For a while, I missed the emotional abuse. For a while, I started to believe that a little happiness is better than no happiness.
You gave me that little happiness but you made sure you give me twice the pain in return. Was it worth it? It wasn’t but I started to believe that maybe it was worth it, that maybe this is how my life is supposed to me and you were the best I could get. I couldn’t me more wrong! Nobody deserves to live like that and nobody deserves a cold, callous and selfish person like you.
It was a destructive relationship and to some level, we both knew it. I let you take over my existence and destroy it slowly until there was nothing left to destroy, that is when you started getting bored with me and why wouldn’t you? You had your fun, you took over my being and you destroyed it completely leaving no trace of my self-worth or self-reliance. Were you proud of yourself? You made sure that you leave a mark on my soul but little did you knew that I am strong enough to survive anything. Even you! I survived you. – Continue reading on the next page