Which one of these is your flirting style?
No matter how committed you are in your current relationship, no matter how satisfied you feel with your partner, and no matter how sternly you keep denying it, you do end up flirting with someone every now and then. Sure, some of us might do it in a very bold and unapologetic fashion while others prefer to be more subtle about it.
The most common form of flirting is usually experienced when you meet someone new, someone you definitely won’t be seeing again, and someone who got you curious from their very first look. A waiter approaches you to ask if you need more drinks and you’re pretty sure he gave you a wink in between. You’re at the grocery store and the guy ahead of you in line keeps offering you to take his place, just to strike up a conversation. You’re at a conference and you notice yourself constantly exchanging glances with the guy you talked to in the ice-breaking session. Ten minutes later, you’re probably going to forget all about the cute waiter, the grocery store guy, and even the guy you met at the conference. But for that one fleeting moment- when they winked or smiled or gazed at you, you felt a sudden rush of excitement and you found yourself wondering whether this chance meeting could ever mean something more.
While the above flirting might be seen as innocent and sort of unintentional, there can be instances when flirting might become something quite dangerous and complicated, especially for all the committed ladies out there. This ‘dangerous flirting’ happens when the object of your desire is actually someone you see on a regular basis – a co-worker, a neighbor, or maybe even your brother in law. It’s not like you’re unhappy with your primary relationship, but the idea of playing around with someone else is just too fun and exciting to instantly let go of. You realize it would be highly inappropriate but you’ve already imagined touching this person in all the wrong places. If you ever end up hugging them ceremoniously at a holiday or a birthday, you feel the need to stop yourself from lingering longer than you should. While all these extreme thoughts are only in your head for now, they might just turn into reality if the other person starts picking up on all your ‘subtle’ cues. And once they do, once they start having the same thoughts as you, and once they actually decide to pursue those thoughts, you might end up falling into a self-created trap of temptation and fear.
Since flirting, in one form or the other, remains a constant part of almost every person’s life, Chong Xing and Jeffrey Hall (2015) have carried out a study and examined the verbal and non-verbal behaviors associated with what they have defined as the five basic flirting styles. Read below to find out which one is yours:
If you’re someone who does not really like flirting with anyone, and someone who prefers to take their due time to actually get to know another person, then the way you interact with someone new will usually be very polite or formal. Even if you feel physically attracted to someone new, you won’t consider teasing them, or making a move to get closer to them. Also read, Your Flirting Style – According to your Zodiac Sign.
The physical kind of flirt will end up touching the people he/she is physically attracted to, usually in a very subtle manner. Maybe a reassuring touch on the hand while the object of their attraction is telling them a heart-felt story or a friendly hug that lasts a little longer than planned. Or just sitting really close to them so that their arms or shoulders are constantly touching. – Continue reading on the next page