A lot of times, relationships can be going very well and the people involved establish a sense of stability and complacency. As a man, you have a natural tendency to not overthink things. You don’t like to overanalyze the nuances of your relationship, and you tend to take a very nonchalant approach to romance. However, you must always maintain proper presence of mind in the relationship; at least enough for you to be able to spot patterns that indicate signs of a dysfunctional partnership between you and your girl.
This way, if you are able to maintain your presence of mind, you will have a sense of control for the situation, and you won’t be relegated to being a victim. You see, there are numerous instances wherein one party of a relationship ends up being abused and misused. You never know when you are playing the fool in the relationship unless you know where to look. You should never allow yourself to be taken advantage of, and that’s why you need to always be wary of the signs.
A person can be used in a variety of ways that don’t evolve love, but the most common instance is when women use men for their finances. You don’t want to be used as a woman’s personal piggy bank, and so you must take action immediately if you notice some of these things in your relationship.
1. She doesn’t introduce you to her friends and family.
It would be weird if she didn’t want to let you take a peek into her life. If she truly were in love with you, she would have no problem with integrating you within her social circles. Either she’s ashamed of you, or she really isn’t in love with you and is just manipulating her way through the relationship.
2. She gets upset over materialistic issues.
She lashes out at you when you forget to pay the cellphone bill. She acts hysterical whenever your car breaks down. She yells at you when the credit card is getting declined. These are seemingly trivial issues that she shouldn’t be getting very upset over.
3. She never likes to stay in.
She only wants to be taken to the most lavish and luxurious restaurants during dates. She doesn’t want to spend a night in. If she truly loved you, she would be okay with just having a simple dinner at home with you. However, you start to notice that modesty is just not something she’s comfortable with.
4. She does what she wants regardless of how her actions make you feel.
She has no regard for your feelings, and she only cares about her own personal interests. She acts on her own accord whether or not her actions make you comfortable. She really doesn’t care about what you think or how you feel so as long as she’s happy and free to do what she wants.
5. She’s taking an unusual interest in one of your friends.
In this case, she might not be using you for your money, but she may be using you to get closer to one of your friends. While this may be a painful truth to swallow, you should be wary of this and make sure that you do not allow yourself to be victimized.
6. She changes who she is depending on the people she’s with.
If her intentions were true, then she wouldn’t be afraid of revealing her authentic self regardless of who she’s with. She should be the same person even if she were alone or if she were in a crowded room. If it’s just the two of you, and she’s acting cold and distant, then you can bet there’s something off. Especially when she acts bubbly and energetic whenever you’re in a group setting.
7. She is constantly demanding for space.
While it is okay to occasionally demand for space in a relationship, there’s something off when this becomes a regular trend. One of the most vital components of a relationship is companionship, and if you feel like she really isn’t living up to that standard, then you can be assured that something fishy is going on.
8. She doesn’t open up to you about her life.
She should be okay with letting herself become vulnerable when she’s around you. She should be comfortable enough with you to let you know whenever something is bothering you. If it feels like she’s always shutting you out of her life, then maybe her intentions in the relationship aren’t as noble as you initially thought.
9. She’s always nagging during the few times she talks to you.
She’s a nagger. She rarely ever talks to you, but when she does, she’s complaining about something. She’s a spoiled brat and it’s all your fault. You’ve practically pampered her into a state of self-entitlement. Now she expects the world from you, and she gets upset whenever you fail to meet her expectations.
10. She never offers to pay for anything.
It’s always you who takes the blow to the wallet. She never pays for dinners, gifts, or movies. It’s you who bears the burdens of the bills, and you don’t even feel like you’re getting anything out of the relationship anymore.
Talk to me
Have you been used? Talk to me about it in the comments below!