Save yourself and walk away.
1. You never get the validation or feeling of appreciation that you need from your partner.
When you’re in a relationship with someone, you should never be so insecure so as to rely on your relationship to give your life and sense of self-worth all the validation that you need. But that doesn’t mean that your partner shouldn’t be making you feel appreciated either. Your partner should always make it a point to make sure that you are made to feel valued and appreciated in the relationship.
2. You have more arguments that you are emotionally capable of dealing with.
All relationships are going to have their fair share of arguments and disagreements every now and then. It’s only normal. We are all individual human beings after all and we each carry within ourselves our own personal worldviews. It’s only a matter of time before we come into conflict with someone about something. But the thing about relationships is that they shouldn’t always be having the same arguments over and over again. When couples are virtually incapable of coming to a compromise or resolving a particular argument, that may be due to an inherent incompatibility issue.
3. Your personal needs and expectations for the relationship are far from being met.
When you go into a relationship, you are always going to have your personal expectations and standards for the relationship. That’s normal behavior. In fact, it’s encouraged. You should always be communicating your expectations, boundaries, and standards to one another in the relationship to make sure that you are constantly making one another happy. If your needs aren’t being met, then that shows a lack of effort on the part of your partner.
4. You keep talking to one another about changing your ways but things always stay the same.
It’s a broken promise after every broken promise. One of you screws up, the other gets angry, you get into a fight, you say sorry, and then you promise to be better and then the cycle repeats itself. A healthy relationship is one that is constantly evolving and learning from its mistakes. If a relationship is incapable of keeping its promise to be better, then it’s a relationship doomed for failure.
5. You don’t know what to do to get your relationship back on the right track.
A lot of relationships go through substantial speed-bumps and woes. That’s normal. But what isn’t normal is when the people in the relationships don’t know the next steps to take to actually fix the problems that they have. Usually, a couple will always have an idea on how to fix whatever issues they may be experiencing. But once a couple feels completely lost, then the relationship is in grave danger.
6. You keep on giving so much of yourself to the relationship even though you don’t really get anything in return.
Part of being in a healthy relationship is balance. You must always be able to give just as much as you’re getting out of a relationship. Remember that a relationship is never a solo venture. You are investing yourself emotionally into an entity that you’re supposedly sharing with someone else. Any imbalance that might occur in the dynamics of the relationship could conclude in substantial dysfunction.
7. You are the only one who keeps on making compromises for the relationship.
Compromises are found in all strong and happy relationships. Granted, no one side could ever be as dominant as the other in a relationship. That’s why compromises are so important. The best relationships are always going to be built on a healthy give-and-take dynamic.
8. You develop resentment and bitterness for your partner and for the relationship.
One big sign that you’re still clinging to a relationship that you should just be letting go of is when you find yourself developing resentment and bitterness for your significant other. It’s normal to be frustrated or occasionally annoyed by your partner in some instances. But if it’s deep-seeded anger and bitterness that you feel for one another, then that’s another story entirely.
9. You have difficulty imagining a future for your relationship with your partner.
Part of wanting to fight for a long-term relationship is actually envisioning a future together with your partner. It’s being able to look at your own personal goals and making sure that they are able to reconcile well with the goals of your partner. But if you find that there is no proper future that both of you can share together, then the relationship is eventually headed to a dead end.
10. You both stop growing and developing as individuals because of the relationship.
A relationship doesn’t have to mean that you have to give up your sense of individuality and identity. In fact, your relationship should motivate and inspire you to actually become a better human being overall. If you feel like your relationship is keeping you from being a better human being, it’s a bad relationship to be in.
Talk to me
Do you agree? Talk to me in the comments below!
This is just what i needed to see. I’m going through this with my gf, well, ex as of a couple of days ago.. I feel like i compromise constantly and do things to suit her needs but i don’t feel i get that in return. Then something happened friday and i told her i needed her beforehand and she let me down, said she forgot, told me it wasnt fair to assume she could read my mind..then gave me some selfish apology.. I didnt assume anything; i literally told her ahead of time it was going to be a hard day for me and that i needed her.
But im stuck here wishing i hadnt broken up with her, especially the way that i did.. And that makes me feel like an unlovable idiot in and of itself.
I don’t think you are wrong, sounds to me you have been being taken advantage of..if she moves you she will seek you and apologize, if she don’t then she was6wirth your time, we go by are emotion when we make a decision , but time will tell.
She was in the wrong. If u came to her an told her u were going to need her on a difficult day an she “forgets”, that’s bs an u deserve better
I have been going through this for quite some time now, at one time I actually told my husband that I no longer love him and do not want to spend the rest of my life with him
To be honest our marriage has never been a marriage, in fact it’s more of roommates
I don’t have any passion to get close to him anymore, for he has never put any effort into our relationship, but has always focused on our matrimonial home. For many years money has gone into improving our house, but not into our marriage, in fact we never even had a honeymoon. I have lost all feelings for him
I’m not saying I hate him, but I don’t love him the way a woman should love their husband
I have such a relationship my husband treat me like dirt I am always going over 100 % to make hi c how I care and want it to work but he chose other people over me he goes out and bad mouth me at friends and family than coming home saying he loves me csnt live without me I feel so all alone in this relationship I feel I like my love for him is skipping away day by day
That is what me ex fiance did to me he would even tell me to sit down he would cook, clean, wash clothes ect, because he knows I have bad feet, when ever an argument would happen he would say I’m lazy I don’t do anything around the house, it felt like it wasn’t just us in the relationship, he would always bring family and friends into it, make them chose side’s and he cared and paid more attention to friend needs and feeling’s would treat me like I’m invisible and blame me for why the friened/s were used.
He would blame me for why the friend/s were upset
God this is like my daily life. I know exactly and I mean exactly what you mean.
If you don’t feel good in a relationship it always mean you two don’t belong to eachother. Sometimes after many years you can discover that your partner and you don’t have the same goals in live, but also that you think differently about things. That does not mean your partner is mean, but it means you don’t have the same expatations or way of living.
I’m in this kind of relationship now and I’m at a loss of words, actions, feelings. He makes me feel like I do everything wrong and he tells me I’m always wrong, and I’m stupid, retarded, all kinds of stuff, hurtful very hurtful and I don’t have anywhere to go cus I have no family or friends.
Going thru this now. Have been for about a yr or two.. smfh. But just keeps getting worse. I’m being so stupid. So f**King stupid. Why do I keep hanging on. Why do I keep putting myself thru the bs. Right now hiding in the bathroom to be away from him and I only see him on weekends. Losing my damn self. I care for him. I truly do. I have love for him. But I am not in love with him. Legit every single one of these is spot on. What is it going to take for me to be done with him for good….?
I’m in the same position as u exactly
I fell exactly what you just said to a T! so sorry but listen we need to learn and not feel stupid for having the optimism to keep trying.
I know how you feel….bathroom became my escape spot and a place to cry. ive.been accused of cheating and never had a thought.of it. and because of his accusations I have suffered abuse and emotional abuse to the point of feeling not breathing would be better. I have had.some awful cruel shit ….and I feel like I let myself down and killed my entire soul allowing myself to go through it. how do u recover from any of it.
Yes 😔😢😢😢
This is everything I keep telling myself daily. I want to let go, I need to let go. For my mental, emotional and physical health I have to let go. I have tried and tried and cried and cried and I am done! I am so over it.
well not sure what’s going on here, but don’t sound like you should be in this relationship, cold turkey it, go off grid get away take a trip without him, go have a life without hurt
I try so hard with my girlfriend to show her how much I love her, deeply.. But during the week hear very little from her, yet at weekends we are amazing in all respects… I have made requests, not demands, but now struggle with the lack of her contact, in most things written in this post. It hurts, painfully…
I say don’t make yourself available, blow her off see how she likes it, maybe she will she her ways, sometimes in my opinion you show them how they treat you and they open their eyes of the possibilities that you might not be there one day
But HOW do you let go ???I can’t stand the thought of hurting him!!! I keep avoiding the issue and hiding my lack of feelings -I live the man we have a child and we had good times but I’m no longer in love with him …what the hell do I do?? Where do I start ??
honestly, seriously think of the first time you met him reminisce over that and see if you can rekindle the feelings you once had, b4 walking away, sounds like you need someone to make you open your eyes and look again, if he is a good man, good father attentive to your needs, spice it up some, because there is very little out in this world thst will commit anymore , rethink !!!
I am stuck. the wife of 20 years is dating and sleeping with a neighbour after 6 weeks she told me to move out after emotional cheating but still not divorce
so she chested first? or you had an emtional cheat? Not clear, personally sounds like something was really missing in your 20 years of marriage ,
I don’t think I would move out if she cheated have her leave, second get a lawyer
I’m in a long distance relationship, 2 hours. . it started out great but now we been apart for 6 weeks. His wife died 3 years ago but I found out that her belongings are still in the home we spend time at. So i gave him a month to clear things up. For us to start fresh, but nothing has changed. I love him and still talk 4 to 6 times a day. He use to come pick me up but now not any more. I think He’s not ready to move on but afraid to ask. We still laugh and talk. I’m just confused I guess. now I question myself if I love him or love myself more to move on. oh, yes we are older in t0s.
Most of these I can most definitely relate to. it literally hurts my heart cuz I don’t want it to be true, that we don’t belong together. but he is a terrible boyfriend. he’s very inconsiderate of me and my feelings and when we get into arguments/fights he says the most awful things to me. very mean hurtful things and makes me feel unwanted and unwelcomed. I absolutely hate it! it’s a huge turn off for me. I’m 38 and thus is only my 2nd relationship I’ve had. my 1st we were together for 16yrs. n he never talked to me the way he does. we never ever got to that point. I believe if u truly love someone then there are certain things that I think that are just impossible to say to ur Lover no matter how mad u are. I’ve always have said that once it gets to that point then it’s a wrap, it’s over. now here I am letting this man talk to me like this. I don’t say mean things back to him cuz I love him truly. so I walk away and I’m silent. I was hoping that after so many times of me doing this that he would follow suit and do the same but it’s only gotten worse. then he goes ghost or we just ignore each other. it tares me up inside! he says I hound him but I only hound him on the way he treats me. his actions is what causes my bi***ing. if he wouldn’t do these things then there wouldn’t be any of my nagging. I will express my feelings, I won’t put them to the side cuz of being afraid that it’s going to cause a fight, that’s not fair nor right at all. my feelings matter. I want to be a priority and not treated like an option. what can I do to get this man’s attention and get him to compromise and communicate with me and to be more considerate?? please help!
She tells me that I mean the world to her and says she loves me; but her actions shows how she truly feels about me. if I don’t call or text then I won’t hear from her. she always telling me “IT’S NOT ALWAYS ABOUT YOU “I come to realize it was never about me, she chose everything and everyone over me.
this is the second time that my wife cheated me with the same person. the first time I thought it was just bad luck and I tried to forgive her and I wanted her back like hell. well this time it is not the same. I feel I have to move on. I’m trying to see the girl that I felt in love with to a person that is so different right now. and I wonder why do people change so much? living with my wife brings me sadness, I am just trying to find the girl I fell in love with. will she ever come back even if I forgive her one more time?
I’m w/ a narcissistic man…he never says he’s sorry & he’s done some awful things to me & my family!! He will lie to the end & never admit the truth even if it is recorded or….. He is always disappearing without notice…never calls me or texts me to say hi or check on me or say he loves me. He & his ex-wife were “swingers”, & I’m not that kinda person, nor do I care to watch corn. My childhood tragedy, I guess is the reason for that. I’ve found numerous pairs of women’s underwear in his pants, drawers, and in his car!! And there’s no talking about it, he walks away saying I’m crazy and I’m supposed to drop it! He dirty up the house etc., & thinks bcuz he’s on disability, he is not supposed to do nothing! He pays most of the bills(his choice, I’ve offered) & says he’s done his time on chores,etc. & bcuz he pays the bills he can do as he pleases. This is our 5th yr of marriage, & the 1st 8 months of this year he has stayed & slept out in a shed he built in the backyard. No explanation, no apology, nor reason for this…I’ve felt so alone!! Our 1st yr of marriage was awesome, see very often& always together…he was my best friend…I thought! But last 4 years maybe see 2-3 times/ yr. And now 8months or more he stayed in the shed he built in the backyard!! But now, now he’s inside the house, sleeps in the bed & acts like nothing ever happened! WTH!! I was at my wits end, & ready to pack up & go!! And now this….I know it’s not for long, or real…Do I give it a GO or do I just GO?? So confused!! And lonely…and hurt!!