10 Stages Of Intimacy In A Relationship

What stage are you on?

It’s very important to preface this article by saying that all relationships are unique. They all carry with them very distinct personalities and traits that make them special. As human beings, we are all unique in our own ways.

We all carry a very unique set of traits and characteristics that we bring with us into our relationships. And when we mix those traits with the traits of another person, then it just makes everything more complex and deep. And that’s why its very hard to generalize relationships – but it’s not impossible to spot out certain trends that most relationships are likely to follow.

Typically, all relationships go through certain steps – certain stages. These stages signify certain turning points in relationships that signify just how deep things are going between two people. And again, while all relationships are unique, it’s fairly reasonable to assume that most couples are going to go through these stages the longer that they stay together. Here are the various stage of intimacy in a relationship:

Stage 1: The Initial Meeting

This is the stage where it all starts. For some couples, it happens by chance. Two strangers having a random chance encounter at a random place. For some, it’s a meeting that takes place by design. Two people who are set up by mutual friends perhaps. Or maybe, it’s two friends who have decided to take a chance on one another in a romantic plane.

Stage 2: Getting To Know One Another

For people who are just meeting for the first time, this is the stage wherein you both really build on the initial attraction that was established during the first meeting. This is when you really try to explore each other’s surface – to really see if there’s something there that the both of you can work with moving forward. For those who are already friends, this is still a period for the two of you to get to know one another – but through a different lens this time. You are already friends and you know each other in that sense. But you’ve never looked at each other through romantic eyes.

Stage 3: Young and Innocent Love

This is the stage of the relationship where everything is still so fresh and new. It’s always exciting and exhilarating. This is usually where a lot of relationships peak. They feel like nothing could possibly go wrong because everything just seems to click. It’s s if everything just falls into place with you two and there’s nothing that either of you could do to mess it up.

Stage 4: Discovering of Quirks and Annoyances

Now, when the young and innocent love stage of the relationship dies down, the problems and imperfect parts of the relationship are going to start to present themselves. This is the stage of the relationship wherein the flaws are going to come out and play – and the world isn’t going to be seen through rose-colored lenses anymore.

Stage 5: Ignoring the Quirks

When the blemishes and imperfections of the personalities start to reveal themselves, it’s everyone’s initial instinct to always suppress or ignore them. They don’t want to tarnish whatever perfect perception they have had regarding the relationship up to this point. And so they will make a genuine effort to just ignore the minor annoyances and flaws. They will act as if everything is still perfect in the relationship. It’s almost like a complete stage of denial that things are getting real.

Stage 6: The Reality Sinks In

But then, you can only ignore these annoyances for too long. It gets to a point where you really need to address the elephant in the room and you really have to tackle the issues in your relationship as a couple. And that’s when the reality of the relationship really starts to sink in.

Stage 7: The Adjustment Period

And then once you make an effort to confront the aspects of your relationship that are less than perfect, you realize that you’re going to have to make a few adjustments yourself. You understand that you need to do your part in meeting your partner halfway. And you also have to be doing your best in trying to put forth the best possible version of yourself. And sometimes, that means having to make a few adjustments to the way you conduct yourself in your relationship.

Stage 8: A Mild Indifference And Irritation

You fight. You make up. You disagree and you act bitter about it. You just jive and you feel like you’re floating on cloud nine. And then they do something that upsets you and you’re back to feeling like you’re stuck in a broken record.

Stage 9: Resurgence of Passion

But then you get reminded of why you’re in a relationship in the first place. You remind yourself of why you fell in love with this person and why you’re fighting so hard to keep things together. And it’s with that realization where you both really learn how to humble yourselves.

Stage 10: Perpetual Coexistence

And after that, once you’re all set, you coast with one another. You face life together and you take everything that comes attached with it.

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