When you are first starting a relationship with someone, everything can feel so fresh and exciting. There is an overwhelming wave of emotions that you have to navigate yourselves through – and it’s all just so exhilarating.
However, just because a relationship gets off to a great start doesn’t mean that it’s destined for a happy ever after. It doesn’t work like that. In fact, statistics dictate that a relationship is more likely to fail than it is to succeed. And that’s just the sad truth of falling in love in general. You are always opening yourself up to the risk of getting hurt.
It can be a very difficult ordeal – having to go through a rough breakup. It’s especially more difficult the more invested and attached you are to a person. When you find yourself in a sudden position of having to detach yourself from this individual who you fell in love with, it’s never an easy situation.
It’s the emotional equivalent of having to sever your arm from your body just so you can get free from being stuck. Moving on is definitely easier said than done. And heartbreak is not an emotional experience that people should be taking lightly.
However, you need to find solace in the fact that plenty of people all over the world throughout the course of human history have had their hearts broken – and a huge bulk of them have managed to survive and move on. So you’re not in an entirely new and unique situation.
People have been where you are and they’ve somehow found a way to escape that emotional hell. You aren’t alone. And if you find yourself having some very dark and scary thoughts about your breakup, don’t worry about it too much. Chances are there are other people who have also thought the same things.
1. Is this all for real?
Denial. It’s something that a lot of people (not just girls) go through whenever something tragic and traumatic happens in life. You start to question the reality of your situation because all of the feelings and emotions just feel a little too overwhelming to bear right now. You can’t seem to rationalize the situation that you’re in.
2. I really need some alcohol right now.
It’s okay to drown your sorrows in alcohol – but remember not to overdo it! You don’t want to start down a path of self-destruction.
3. I wonder what I could have done better.
And you will want to rationalize everything. You will want to know where you went wrong – and this is a healthy way to go about dealing with the breakup. It shows humility in that you admit that you might have had your shortcomings; and you want to be able to learn from them.
4. I don’t want to face the world anymore.
After a difficult breakup, there are plenty of things that you might be feeling. Sometimes, you can feel fear, shame, anxiety, indifference, or an overwhelming mixture of all these things. As a result, you might not necessarily deem yourself fit to see anyone or face the world. And that’s fine. Take as much time as you need to heal and recuperate.
5. I’m going to block him from all of my social media.
One of the most effective ways to get over someone is to erase all evidence of that person’s existence in your life. And so blocking him on your social media might sound like a reasonable idea.
There are plenty girls who use travel as a way of getting over rough times. It’s a literal manifestation of a person running away from her problems. And if the breakup is causing you too much heartache, maybe a change of scenery for a while might actually do you some good.
7. I should go shopping.
Retail therapy might be good for the heart but it isn’t always good for the bank account. Remember to shop responsibly!
8. Where are my girls?
Of course, you are going to want to turn to your girls for some emotional support. That’s what friends are for after all. They’re supposed to have your back when you’re at your lowest. Go and pour your heart out to your closest gal pals.
9. I really don’t need him to be happy.
And it’s true. You should be proud for having this thought after a breakup. The reality is that the only person you ever really need to bring happiness into your life is yourself. Your happiness is never going to be dependent on another person.
10. What was I thinking getting with him in the first place?
And naturally, if you’ve really moved on from him after the breakup, you might have some regrets about ever getting with him in the first place. It happens. It’s a sign that you’ve definitely grown out of being in love with him.
Talk to me
Ladies, is this true for you? Talk to me in the comments below!