10 Things You Do That Will Kill Your Relationship

These tiny things ruin relationships.

1. You give your partner an ultimatum.

If you make your partner choose between yourself and something else that’s very much important to them, then that’s just plain unfair. You shouldn’t expect them to choose you in that scenario either. When you truly love someone, you never give them ultimatums. You never make them choose between your relationship and something else that is close to their heart. You have to be able to find a way to conflate all of those things in a healthy romantic environment.

2. You invade your partner’s sense of privacy and personal space.

You have to remember that just because you’re in a relationship together doesn’t automatically mean that you are granted unlimited access to the various aspects of your partner’s life. You aren’t entitled to owning and controlling your partner like some sort of object. You have to respect that your partner is still a human being who has boundaries and rules that you have to respect if you still want to keep them in your life.

3. You treat your partner like a baby.

You shouldn’t ever be treating your partner like some immature child who doesn’t know how what they’re doing. You have to remember that equality and balance are essential aspects of a harmonious relationship. If you constantly envision yourself as someone who is above your partner in the relationship, then you can likely expect your partner to get fed up of that kind of treatment fairly quickly.

4. You don’t allow your partner to be their own person.

You are always expecting your partner to play a mere role in your own life, but you never allow them to be a primary player in theirs. You dictate everything for them. You discourage them from their goals and dreams. You don’t support them in their endeavors. And in the end, your selfishness will be the reason that they leave you.

5. Your request for a temporary break in the relationship.

Temporary breaks are always tricky. While it can work for some, it’s never an advisable method of addressing rough patches. You can still stay together as you work through your problems as a couple. You can take some more space to do your own things, but that doesn’t mean that you have to completely hit pause on your relationship.

6. You still play immature relationship games.

You have to remember that relationships can only ever really be sustained by two mature individuals. So if you find yourself constantly playing immature relationship games with your partner, then you are just killing the romance. You don’t want to text first because you think it makes you weak. You don’t want to apologize because you don’t want to give your partner leverage. You give your partner the silent treatment instead of just telling them what’s wrong. These are all immature games and you need to stop them.

7. You demand too much communication.

Communication is essential for any relationship. But there is also this concept of having too much of a good thing. Remember that you don’t even need to be in constant communication with one another. You don’t always have to be conversing every single second of every single day. You have to allow one another to live with each other’s individual lives. Communication is important but it’s not something that needs to be done round the clock.

8. You constantly hold the mistakes of his past over his head.

At some point, you have to acknowledge that the mistakes of your partner’s past don’t necessarily define their present or their future. You have to stop holding their past mistakes over their head. There is no point in reopening old wounds just to make them feel bad about themselves. This is a very effective method of just driving your partner away.

9. You still maintain an unhealthy closeness with your ex.

No one likes it whenever the ex is still in the picture. But for a lot of secure and mature partners, they would be able to bear the fact that you and your ex are still friends. However, it’s highly likely that no one would be able to bear scenarios with you still being intimate and flirty with an ex. It’s a very weird circumstance that very few people (if any at all) want to be a part of.

10. You act unfaithful or disloyal to your partner.

Cheating is always going to be a big no-no in any relationship. You can’t expect your partner to still want to be with you if you’re constantly cheating on them whether in a physical or emotional capacity. And yes, it’s possible to be emotionally cheating on someone. You don’t have to be having sex for you to be cheating. Whenever you flirt with the intention of gaining someone’s emotional favor, that’s already an act of cheating in itself. And if you keep on doing that in your relationship, don’t expect your partner to want to stick around.

Talk to me

Have you been to this place? Talk to me in the comments below!

  1. My fiancee is still in love with his ex and I’m not comfortable with that, what do I do to stop the relationship?

    1. Please leave him and give him sometime to love you…else you will be stuck even after marriage confused on where u stand in his life n heart…

  2. Ive had some issues with my boyfriend talking to other females on fb messenger and one being an ex that has also been a longtime friend asking for tittie shots for jokes. How do i ignore it to stay strong

  3. i need some advise my bf and me already ldr how 2month he always accusing me that i am doing bulshit her..but i did not do any wrong her and he always fight and block me 5 days now we never talk and see..

  4. The one I’ve been with for 6 years tends to bring up things that I have done I the past even though I have asked her not to bring up the past but before I go further into this I only did it to try to open her eyes on how she was treating me yes we fight and argue but what couple doesn’t fight or argue about things but for it goes even deeper she has called me names that I used to be called as a kid like “retarded mf” but with a few added words to that that I will not put on here plus she’s treated me like a kid out in public and has talked down to me and at one point she used to put herself on a pedestal saying she was better than was and saying that she was smarter than I was I had to break her of that or she was gone no it’s and’s or but’s about it I told her that no one was better than the other person that we were all created equal in gods image yes there are people that has better qualities than another or one might have more knowledge than another in certain aspects in life or in certain subjects than others but that doesn’t make a person better than another because we all make mistakes in life that either regret , learn from them and know not to go down that road or just flat out regret making those mistakes ♥

  5. Hello!!!
    Just walk away….
    He will never be faithful to you.
    Unless you want to be wondering around Constantly. Not healthy.

  6. My ex husband of 24 yrs did all the above except he wouldn’t communicate enough. He also put friends and extended family above our children and me. He basically chose friends over his family as in he was too busy flirting and meeting with a female “friend” to do his part around the house and with the kids and within our marriage for our relationship. He wasn’t always that way; he became that way over the last 5 yrs of our relationship. It took me 2 yrs to file for divorce after seeing text messages from him to another woman, then it took 2 yrs for the divorce to go through … during that time one of our daughters found a hand written letter from a woman to him. He’s still with that woman today. Good riddance! My current husband treats me and my grown kids and grandkids way better than my ex ever treated us. I am thankful for my current husband and our relationship! To anyone else putting up with crap, DON’T!!! If the love and respect isn’t equal and mutual in your relationship, move on because you deserve better. If you’re the one messing up the relationship, move on because your partner deserves better.

  7. what should i do, almost this 10 is present to me this days except that i have an ex. we’re almost 11 years in relationship, he has daughter to his ex.. 10 years past but never talked about his past, when i got pregnant his daughter and ex are now asking him to go back with them, we had a child. he is my first love. i also asked him if he would go back to his ex and daughter but he refused and said that past is past. overthinking kills me slowly, past partum also attacks me

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