When you have to let someone go, it’s heartbreaking.
Speaking from experience, letting go of something very dear to you is definitively the hardest thing to do. Your heart and mind are sort of at war with each other, and you sometimes feel like giving it all up. This article is based on my own experiences and what I had to go through before I convinced myself that it’s time to let go and move on with my life.
Here are ten things you need to know when you have to let someone go.
10. Is it worth it?
Letting go of people you were once or still are madly in love with is a horrible thing to go through. The first thing you need to do is ask yourself a few questions:
- Will you be hurting yourself more in the future if you stayed?
- Is there a way that the past won’t come back to haunt you one day?
- Will you be okay one day if you see them again somewhere?
- Do you have enough strength to let go of the memories?
9. Don’t let others make your decision for you
Only you know what’s best for you. I let my friends put thoughts in my head, and they always made me make the wrong decisions. Do not, for one second, worry about what others would say.
8. Not everything or everyone is meant to stay forever
If you keep finding it harder to let go, understand that nothing in life is intended to remain indefinitely. People pass away; relationships break, divorces happen, nothing is meant to stay till the end. We all are only doing our parts in making sure they stay. But in all honesty, nothing does. If you’ve done your best for someone and you’re still not able to keep them in your life, let them go and be happy about it. Use that energy to make yourself comfortable.
7. Base your happiness on yourself only
You can never base your happiness on someone else. If you do, you’ll be finding yourself in a very tough spot one day. It’s fine to be in love and be happy WITH someone else. But it is seriously NOT fine to depend on someone for happiness. You should be enough to make yourself comfortable. Love yourself, find joy in yourself, connect with yourself, and stop depending on others. Only then can you find the courage to let go genuinely.
6. Don’t allow yourself to be haunted by the past
One of the main reasons why we have trouble letting go is because of the memories. Because we make ourselves think and ponder over the past too much. You need to find a way to think of the present and the future; thinking and fretting over the past will only make you weaker. Only you can decide whether you want to cry over the past or create a bright future for yourself.
5. The world changes with you
Understand that it’s all in your head. The world is neither with you nor against you. It is entirely up to you how you want your days to end and your mornings to begin. You can either make your life more complicated day by day, or you can stand up for yourself, change your perceptions and live a happier life even without the person you thought would be with you till the very end. It’s all under your control.
4. Take a stand or make excuses
Like I said, only YOU have the power to change things in your life. It’s up to you to keep making excuses for not letting go or to finally take a stand and do what’s right. The more you delay the inevitable, the more it’ll hurt you when it happens.
3. Crush the weaknesses
We are only as weak as we let ourselves be. Find and analyze your weaknesses, find out the reasons why you won’t let the person go, and CRUSH them! No one can make you weak until you let them.
2. Know your worth
When I was going through a breakup, I suddenly started blaming myself for everything; I noticed that my self-worth was dropping by the second! Do NOT let that happen. You are worth more than that. A very crucial point in letting someone go is to know your true worth and to know why you don’t deserve to be treated below your worth.
1. Learn from the past
Every day is a new lesson. We all make mistakes in the past, but we let them go in vain if we don’t learn from them. Learn from your past, remember the lessons, and then let go of the past. Only then can you be brave and strong enough to love yourself and hence, be loved by someone you truly deserve!