The first kiss between two people in love is rarely ever awkward and foolish. It’s not always going to be as magical and as flawless as they make it out to be in the movies. Of course, the more that you kiss one another, you get better in time. You discover more about what the other likes and you learn from each experience.
But when it’s the first kiss, you have nothing to base your technique off. So you’re essentially just winging it – and sometimes, it doesn’t always work. And that’s okay. That’s part of being vulnerable with another person. It’s also part of the innocence of early love.
And it’s not just girls who feel really awkward when it comes to the first kiss. There is this notion that girls tend to be the ones who get overexcited and put too much pressure on the milestones of a relationship. But guys get nervous too. In fact, guys probably get a lot more nervous than girls do because men typically tend to just suppress their feelings a lot.
And so they get overwhelmed by their emotions whenever things start to get real and heavy. And you know what the most nerve-wracking thing about being a guy having a first kiss is? It’s him who has to make the first move. And that is always going to be terrifying. He doesn’t want to come off as too strong – and he doesn’t want to be made a fool of if you actually reject his advances. And so he places a lot of pressure on himself too. Don’t forget that.
No matter how cool or smooth he might seem as he’s leaning in to kiss you for the first time, his heart is probably trying to jump right out of his chest. A million thoughts are probably running though his head at that moment and he’s not able to keep up with any of them. He is just as invested in this first kiss as you are. And if you really want to know what his mind is like as he’s kissing you, then read on:
“She looks so beautiful, I really want to kiss her already.”
But of course, he doesn’t want to rush into anything. He doesn’t want to pressure you into it. But he can’t deny just how irresistible you look in his eyes. He just wants to have all of you right away.
“I hope my breath doesn’t smell. I should probably find some breath-mints.”
He knows that one of the biggest destroyers of a quality kiss is bad breath. And he wants to make sure that he’s minty fresh for your first kiss.
“Would it be okay with her if I kissed her? Is it right to ask her first?”
He debates the idea of asking for your permission first – and whether or not you would actually respond.
“Hopefully, no food is stuck in my teeth.”
He doesn’t want you to be finding some surprise after-dinner food in his mouth as you’re licking away at one another’s tongues. That would be a very unwelcome surprise.
“I wonder if she can tell that I’m really nervous about this.”
He is nervous. But he doesn’t want you to know it. He still wants to act all cool and confident.
“Just do it!”
It’s not just a catch phrase for a popular shoe brand. It’s a lifestyle. He doesn’t want to overthink it anymore and he’s just going to go ahead and do it.
“What am I supposed to do with my hands?”
He’s kissing you now and he loves it. But he doesn’t know what you want him to do with his hands. Where should he be holding you?
“How much tongue am I supposed to use? I don’t want to be too sloppy.”
He wants to use his tongue – but he also doesn’t want to come off as too sloppy and inexperienced. So he tries his best to concentrate on using just the right amount.
“I want to see if she likes it but I need to keep my eyes closed.”
He wants to know if you’re liking what he’s doing. But he also knows that he needs to keep his eyes closed and concentrate on the actual kiss.
“What am I supposed to do now that it’s over?”
Is he supposed to smile at you? Is he supposed to kiss you again right away? Is he supposed to say ‘thank you’?
“I wonder what this kiss means for our relationship.”
And now the deed is done – but the relationship is only beginning. Right? That’s what he’s thinking about. He knows that the first kiss is a big deal. And he’s wondering about what this might mean for your relationship.
“I can’t wait to kiss her again.”
And of course, regardless of whether it was a good kiss or not, he’s going to want to do it again. He’s going to want to kiss you the next time he sees you. He wants to pick things up where they left off.
Talk to me
Men, do you agree? Talk to me in the comments below!