There’s nothing more depressing than keeping quiet about your feelings. It hurts when you have to keep things to yourself that you need to let out. It’s one of the healthiest things to have the right level of communication with your partner; the back and forth of feelings into words are just beautiful, and it helps both of you stay happy.
Here are 12 things you need to say before it’s too late
1. Is Something Bothering You?
I’ve seen a lot of couples break apart due to a massive lack of communication. Asking if something isn’t quite right with your partner doesn’t take much effort, and it makes them feel like you’re there for them, and they can talk to you when they’re going through a rough patch.
It doesn’t take much to ask them if you see a change in their moods if you feel like they’re not quite the same with you if you feel a difference in the way they talk to you, it all probably means they’re sad or hurt about something, and you can make it that much easier on them by letting them know you’re there for them.
Nor you or your spouse is perfect. Confessing all the negative behaviors which you have is one of the best ways to get a tough conversation started. You should be prepared to make any changes that are needed after taking a candid survey of your faults. This is especially if you think that your spouse should make alterations too. Try speaking in the same way to your partner in which you want to be spoken to.
First, think about how you pick things and then think about how your spouse does. Try to ask questions from yourself like what makes your partner bear all, what makes them angry or shut down, and when they are very responsive? When you always blame someone for something, they will stop talking to you. The best way to do discussions is without finger-pointing.
2. I Need You
The happiest couples are those who acknowledge each other’s importance and how lost they are without each other. “I need you” are three straightforward yet compelling words that can grow the love between the two of you by tenfold.
You are in love with them; there’s a reason you chose to be with them, there is absolutely no shame in admitting how much you need them in your life, in your ups and downs, in your accomplishments, in your successes and your failures, you need them in everything.
There is no shame in telling anyone how much you need them; these are the words that can boost your relationship in the right way.
3. My Life Is Pretty Great
Self-pity is something you don’t need in your life. If you ever feel down about your experience, try looking at all the awesome things you have that most people suffer for. I’m not talking about material things here; Relationship Rules is not that petty.
I’m talking about being able to see the infinite beauty of the world, being able to hear all the fantastic sounds and voices, being able to touch, being able to walk, every little thing that you probably don’t pay attention to or are thankful for anymore are the things that you need to be happy about. Trust me; your life is incredible.
Try to enjoy even the smallest things in life as they are never going to come back once they are gone. The people, the places and everything is lovely. When you love your life, you will love the people in it. Your partner is the central part of your life, so you need to enjoy your life to love them.
4. I Can Deal With This
Believe in yourself, life will throw a lot of obstacles your way, but it will never give you more than you can handle. We all have our ups and downs, and the way we conquer our downs is what makes us who we are and makes us awesome.
Whenever you find yourself stuck in a difficult situation, no matter how impossible it seems, tell yourself you can and WILL handle it. Do not forget, no matter what happens, this too shall pass. You will get temporary relief by avoiding issues, but it will give birth to long-term stress. I’m sure that you are aware of the real results of weight, too – you can get ill from its impact.
One of the best ways for partners to sort it out is by giving each other practical and emotional support. Do not try to judge your partner if they fail to support you. Maybe your partner is not feeling very good as well. What mostly happens when you are stressed that you think everybody, including your partner, is trying to increase it for you.
So if there are any problems in your relationship or life after marriage, now is the best time to sort all of the issues. If you continue doing what you always do, nothing will change. If you start having wishful thinking, it will make things even worse. I advise you to get help from an experienced couple counselor if you are going through this situation. You will feel good when you discuss with an expert that what is going in your relationship.
5. Can I Help You In Any Way?
Nothing makes your partner more proud of having you than knowing that you’re always there to help them out when they need it. My girlfriend has a lot of tough things I can help her with, even though I know she will never accept my help because she likes dealing with things her way, I ask her anyway. She always appreciates the fact that even after knowing she’ll say no, I still insist and ask. It’s a simple question; it will only make you two stronger in the long run.
Or something terrible may have happened with your partner at work, or maybe they suffered a loss, which is not possible for you to cover up. Many things like this may go wrong in life. Having a partner who is supportive emotionally is one of the very best things in the world you have got, and you should be very thankful for it. It is your partner who will help you go through this phase of life.
Your loved one may sometimes do not react the way you are expecting them to. They let all their feelings and emotions come out, and this is very bad and destructive for any relationship. Even if we feel like saying anything, we should learn to filter all those words which can hurt our partners’ feelings. They are already in pain, and if we speak anything wrong, they may feel alone, and this could destroy the relationship.
To support your partner, you don’t have to do anything which you are not happy with. If you are unhappy with any decision of your partner, or he took any action, then you should try to talk about it, you can even talk about it with the help of a third-party. You should always try to communicate in a very gentle way as your partner can be hurt by yet a slightly wrong word at this phase of their life. You both should know how to help each other in such situations best,
6. I Trust You
Trust is the most valuable and rare asset in the world today. It is tough to create and even harder to maintain. Tell them you trust them; it doesn’t matter if they know it already. Reassuring words are very healthy and help create a happy relationship.В You should not tell anyone what your partner tells you in the confidence of relationship, or it will destroy their trust in you.
The more time you two spend face-to-face with each other, the more trust you will build. This is because communication will remove all the distances between you two and make you two more open with each other, which in turn will increase the level of trust. You two should not rely only on phone calls or emails.
Try to fulfill all the small promises you make. If you say you will call, then do call if you say you will be at any place, try to be there. Fulfilling these little promises will increase your partner’s trust in you and will make your relationship better in the long run. Another way to build trust is by apologizing for any mistake you make. When your partner knows that it is from your heart, they will have confidence in you.
7. I Believe In You
Having faith in someone is a beautiful thing. Your partner wants you to tell them you have confidence in them, and you believe in them. No matter how difficult and impossible their endeavors may seem, tell them they can do it. They’ll never forget it.
If you genuinely love each other, you have to believe in each other.В If you try this out, you will see that it will increase your love, trust, and everything. It will make your relationship healthy. If you tell your partner that you believe in them, they will feel motivated, and in the future, they will even try to do more for you. When they do more for you, your belief in them will increase even more.
8. Society Doesn’t Matter
I say this to my fans all the time; culture does NOT matter. Do not let people judge your life and your decisions. Do not fall prey to their traps and their wishes. You have your own life to live and your problems to deal with. No one knows what you’re going through, and they don’t need to know. Be happy with who you are and be satisfied with the person you’re with, without asking for any acceptance from anyone else. Only a few people matter.
Society won’t spare you in any way. They will always have something to criticize you for whom you are with. After all, it’s your happiness which matters and not society, so it is with the one you feel happy with. Try to make yourself happy with the choices which you think are right for you and not culture.
9. I Forgive You
Let go of the negativity. Forgiveness is one of the most precious gifts you can give to someone. If they made a mistake and promise not to make it again, forgive them. You won’t be stupid for overlooking them; you’ll only be the bigger person. But NEVER say it if you don’t mean it, only say it if you can genuinely forgive them with all of your heart.
You must learn to forgive in other to have a positive and healthy relationship. Of course, a relationship has many different components as well, but forgiving is the one that binds it. Forgiveness can be called as one of the main positive attributes of a good relationship with your partner. In any relationship, there will always be space for many moments of frustration, disagreements, and different opinion, and one of the essential parts of a good relationship is the way we deal with these issues.
The way we deal with them can make our relationship success or failure. If we do not forgive, then from time to time, this negativity will build. However, our relationships can improve a great way if we learn to forgive wholeheartedly and let go of the insult and bitterness.
10. I Love Myself
Love who you are, not what you can be or want to be. The person you are right now is precisely the person you should love and respect. It’s not possible to love someone when you don’t like and respect yourself enough. You must have heard that before someone else can have you, you have to love yourself. This is because often, our partner is a reflection of ourselves. Just as like attracts like so we mostly like people who we think are like us. Each of us has a different perspective of looking at things around us.
What we like, what we eat, where we want to be, and all these things are different for different individuals. We like to be with people who have made the same choices in life like ours. If you realize that you are perfect, then eventually, you will start loving yourself. You should think that no one can do things the way you do them. No one can have your ambitions and talent. No one can be you.
The day you try to believe that you are the only one, you will start to see others in the same way. But you are mostly attracted to the sex opposite you; this is the universal truth. You have to accept yourself to accept others. It will be easier for you to change and improve after you take yourself. Try to find the person you will like to be with; then, you can try to become the type of person they want to be with. It’s so simple, but you have to work at least.
11. I Respect You
Respect is a two-way street; you need to give it to earn it. Always tell your partner you respect them, that’s why you love them, and that’s why you’re with them. Because you love and appreciate them for who they are and the decisions they make and the personality they carry.
Respect is a two-way rule. You have to give respect to own it for yourself. Take an in-depth survey of your relationship and then if you do not find anything in your partner worth respecting, consider why you are in a relationship with them. Try to address those issues which are causing resentment or mistrust in the relationship. Don’t sit quietly. It’s only you who can fix it and no one else.
You should avoid treating each other disrespectfully and rudely. Never try to talk sarcastically to your partner; you will ruin relations in a couple of minutes even if you decide to speak that way. You should view the opinions and wishes of your partner and respect them. The day-to-day tensions can also erode respect slowly and gradually. If anyone of you is struggling with issues or is stressed, you may become negative and irritable, and shout on your partner.
This will give rise to a cycle when both of you feel very disrespectful and negative to each other. Similarly, anger can be aroused if you cannot resolve daily conflicts. While if any issues are addressed in a blaming way, it will also make both of you lose respect for each other.
It takes much effort to sustain respect in any relationship. We are all humans, and if our partner starts to treat us disrespectfully, we often do the same. So this sort of disrespect often feeds on itself. The more one is rude, the more likely it is that the other will behave the same in response.
So do try not to bring disrespect between your relationship. If I have any problem with my girlfriend, I always tell her but in a circle of respect, and that’s what keeps our relationship goes on.
12. I Love You
Last but not least, tell them you love them. These three little words have the power to turn a frown into a smile. Even if they know it already, it doesn’t matter. Reassure them every day, not because you fall in love with them every day, but because you ARE in love with them!
It will be an excellent feeling if we drop all or defenses and are completely expressive without a single drop of fear. This would be the only way we can tell people the value that they carry in our lives and the way we want to be with them. We could say to them the way we feel about them, the way we love to talk to them, the way we like hanging out with them, and so much more.
If we omit the expression of our feelings, it means we take our partner for granted, which is not good at all. Many people still regret not telling their partner that they love them, and this leaves their hearts wounded for a lifetime. You have to be fearless and express all your feelings to your partner. If you do not show your love, your partner will never know about it. So get up, grab the chance and say I love you to your partner if you haven’t mentioned yet.
We all know that hearing your partner say I love you or You are my life is one of the most cherished movements of any relationship. But what mostly happens is that none knows when to say it, and so each of the partners waits for the other to say it first. Positive attitudes are expressed by romantic love. Answering these three magical words gives personal flourishing.
That’s it for now. I hope you enjoyed reading this article as much as I enjoyed writing it. As I say all the time, I do this for you guys. So don’t be afraid to share your feelings and speak your mind in the comments below. Stay blessed and keep the love alive!