I see red flags, I run.
1. They refuse to see a reality or perspective beyond their own.
What they believe to be true is going to be the only truth for them. They are the kinds of people who would never entertain the thoughts and perspectives of other people. They are selfish and they only genuinely believe their own point of view. They automatically invalidate the perspectives of other people.
2. They willingly manipulate the people around them to do whatever they want.
They have no problems or qualms with using people as tools or objects to get what they want. They would willingly step on the toes of others just to get ahead. They are only ever really thinking of themselves. And just as long as they get what they want, they don’t really care about the welfare of other people.
3. They will lie about anything just to gain an advantage or get out of trouble.
They have no problems with deceiving other people. They are so disrespectful to the point that they don’t think that anyone around them is deserving of the truth. They willingly lie just to get themselves out of a difficult bind. Often, they will throw innocent people under a bus if it meant saving themselves.
4. They never apologize or recognize any wrongdoing they might have committed.
They always see themselves as perfect beings. They don’t think that they are capable of doing any wrong in the world. They always think that they are special people who are above apologies. They see that everything that they do is right. Or even when they know they’re wrong, their pride doesn’t allow them to apologize for it.
5. They conceal the truth and their motivations when it’s convenient.
Not only are they fond of lying, but they are also fond of concealing the truth. They will say one thing even when their heart feels something else. They know that they have the upper hand whenever they don’t show all of their cards.
6. They never respect anyone’s time other than their own.
They willingly make other people wait but they never wait for other people. When it comes to time, they are always so selfish. They always want everyone else to adjust to their own personal schedules. They think that their time matters more than those of others. They see themselves as superior beings who get monopolies on how time should be spent.
7. They always require the attention of the people around them.
They are needy and they need constantly validation from others. They are insecure and they need other people to give them attention in order for them to feel important and valuable in this world.
8. They act irresponsibly on a consistent basis.
They do or say whatever they want without thinking about the repercussions. They do whatever they want without thinking about how their actions might harm the people around them. They say whatever they want without thinking about how their words might scar those who hear them. They just go about life irresponsibly with a care in the world.
9. They don’t always act like their true selves.
They are always going to be hiding something. They are always going to be suppressing who they really are. They will never allow themselves to be vulnerable because they don’t want anyone to have that power over them. They are master manipulators and they know that if they don’t show who they really are, they will never be victims of manipulation.
10. They never really make an effort to keep peoples’ trust.
Whenever people place their trust in them, they never make an effort to keep that trust. They are the kinds of people who willingly break promises left and right. They will tell you one thing but they would never be able to back it up with real and concrete actions. Or perhaps they are able to, but they just don’t care enough to actually do anything.
11. They feel entitled to everyone’s kindness and fair treatment.
They see themselves as the center of the universe. And they get upset whenever people criticize them or shame them for something bad that they’re doing. To them, they are entitled to constant praise and admiration. In their eyes, if a person doesn’t like them, then there’s something wrong with that person not with them.
12. They manufacture their own truths out of thin air.
They do whatever they can to make you think that you’re crazy. They will manufacture their own truths and they will make it seem like everyone else is lying.
13. They rarely ever feel guilt or remorse about terrible things that they do.
They don’t really care about how peoples’ feelings other than their own. They just live their lives without really thinking about what kind of impact they can have on the world around them. They do whatever they want and even when they know that they are being selfish, toxic, and destructive, they don’t really care.
Talk to me
Have you been in such a situation? Talk to me in the comments below!
I am in one currently. We have been together for five years but she has gone cold towards me. She flares up at me when I correct her. She doesn’t love control. She rebels a lot. What I don’t know is if she is keeping an affair outside the relationship because she la ks empathy towards me ; and cuts me off when I’m talking to her. Her silence is so obvious that it upsets me, leaving me guessing as to what she’s up to. She lies a lot about her movements. She doesn’t feel responsible for her behavior, hardly apologizes.
She’s narcissistic get out there before is to late
You’re the evil one. No relationship should be controlling. To control your partner is to control a human. You do not want a loving, caring relationship. You want a servant. You want a slave. Stop lying to yourself and all of us and take some responsibility for the messed up relationship you’ve tried to create.
I am just waking up and realizing the man I had four children with his evil I was so blinded by love that I lied to myself and went against my intuition and my gut feeling that there was something wrong with him. This man attacks me cusses me cusses me out calls me all kinds of names he yells at me for anything and everything in front of our four very young he literally will not take any accountability for anything in his life apparently I am the reason why his life is crappy and I’ve never once heard him claim responsibility for his actions or his life. He had me so messed up in the head for a while there I thought I was to blame and I felt awful and I was depressed and oh God it was awful finally I got away from him I cannot believe I live like that for so many years I never had peace it felt like he was stealing my joy of my spirit my life he hated when I would be happy so I would have to dim my life for him so I went upset him cuz anytime I was happy he would somehow start an argument how I’m a horrible person he likes me to just sit there and be quiet and just let him use my body that’s all he wanted before was to have sex nothing else I cannot believe how many years I wasted how many years I lied to myself I was too prideful to admit that I have been saved by an evil man I really didn’t believe that there’s people out there who are actually like that I really did not know that someone could be so cruel and so evil so twisted I learned a valuable lesson never go against your intuition got your spirit ever and there are evil people out there I got tricked that man stole so much from me and he does not care he actually is going around telling me people I’m crazy and I’m the crazy one I’m the messed up one his family talks to me they don’t like him and I get to hear all the crazy stuff about me it’s baffling how somebody can live so much I truly believe he believes his life like he lives in his own little world of deception his reality is so false and fake and he’s completely blind or maybe he’s just completely evil I don’t know either really really stupid or the straight up evil and I I hate to think that I have four children with a man that’s I would almost call Ted Bundy. Trust your gut ladies these evil ones are good they’re really good at lying and messing with your head especially if you’re trusting a loving caring person they prey on the good they literally pray on good people I think their goal in life is to destroy God’s people that man almost destroyed me now I know there really are people out there if someon.e seems fake and you feel like they’re fake they are. Ladies always be on guard get your guard up and may God bless you all
I’m so sorry you went through this but I can relate as I’ve been married to my wife who is much like your husband. She hid her true intentions and flawed character from me for decades until I woke up from the fog. She too would sap the energy out of me. Whenever I was happy or excited she would soon after start the pot stirring to try to make me upset angry or sad. Two decades later, I woke up one day and realized I didn’t recognize the man I was staring back at in the mirror. I used to be athletic, often told I was good looking, optimistic, kind and in some instances niave. I was changed into an overweight, angry pessimistic individual and I made the decision that day to hand it over to GOD and it was transforming. I was on the road to getting “me” back and I still am. I recently started going grey rock and not reacting to her provocations. I stopped putting effort into the relationship which previously gave lher fodder to manipulate and provoke. I stopped participating. I know via the literature that she will eventually move on bc she is a cluster B personality bc if she cant get negative reactions from me via her provocations then she cant ger her supply from me, much like a vampire she will find another source. I am convinced she ready has another “source” bc there are obvious signs but I don’t evrn care anymore. I’m just biding my time until she discards me so I won’t have to deal with her drama when I leave.
Narcissists are often compared to vampires and are often called energy vampires. She can’t see others perspectives, can’t show compassion or empathy like us mortals. She can’t connect like a healthy person can and provocates to illicit a response to get her fill. On one hand I want to help repsir our marriage but we’ve gone to three marriage counselors with no improvement bc cluster Bs are manipulative with counselors. She convinced two out if the three that “everything” was my fault!!! If you know about counseling, no masters trained therapist focuses just on just one person in marriage counseling. They focus on the dynamic between both bc the former just makes the marital problems worse..its a form of scapegoating and also retraumatizing for the neurotypical partner in the marriage. This is just how manipulative the Narcissistic is in ANY relationship. The third counselor basically told me she was incredibly shallow and unable to connect and to either “radically accept” her as she is…abuse and all, or get out. Seven years later and I’ve all but given up on our marriage bc I now know it was a sham from the beginning. So just know that cluster B disorders like Narcissism are not gender specific meaning that new literature exists that shows that both sexes can have this disorder equally. The problem is most men have the overt type of Narcissism and women the covert type that is difficult to pick up on even for professionals. But many people are becoming privy to this disorder and how to pick up on it early so avoid the chaos. Be well…
Hi i m also living with some how this kind of person.kindly help me
I am currently married to him and all these signs and more is what he’s doing and how he is. My family doesn’t speak to me anymore because apparently he caused my mother’s death (is this even possible? According to them he was torturing her over the phone and she got a sudden heart attack and died).
He lies about absolutely everything and have no regard for anyone but himself. I can go on forever but don’t know how to get out of it as I am in a residency situation. I can constantly feel the evil if it makes sense
Omg this person sounds hot i need unapologetic twisted shits like these in my life 😍
I have been in this marriage for 17 years this man lie cheat steal manipulate gaslite call me all kind of name I I applied for devorce am waiting I can’t Waite till if final we are going thrue a devorce and this man won’t leave the home so I have to Waite for court I hate this peace a shit so much I just want out n my space