Skip to content
All About Men

18 Older Men Reveal Their Biggest Turn-Ons Now That They’re More Mature

Abigail Renee Abigail Renee | March 22, 2019 | 4 min read

The truth is that younger and more immature men are a lot easier to flirt with. They are mostly letting their hormones lead them into their relationships. They let their desires for physical intimacy drive their preferences in the women that they date. And that’s not necessarily something that is too difficult to navigate. A younger and more immature man doesn’t necessarily have much depth or complexity.

However, if you’re curious to know about what turns on a more mature and older man, then this is the article for you. Highlighted here are real revelations from men about what turns them on the most in the women that they meet.

1. Intelligence

“I am just so tired of being with women who are too dense to grasp complex and difficult topics. I want to converse with someone who is smart enough to challenge my intellect and actually stimulate my mind.”

2. Sanity

“I’m just far too old to be dealing with someone who isn’t entirely there on a mental level. I don’t want to have to deal with crazy women anymore.”

3. Fiscal Responsibility

“As I get older and older, money becomes more and more important. And I really don’t want to have to be with a woman who is only going to serve as a financial burden to me. I’ve got my own problems to worry about.”

4. Ambition

“A girl without ambition is a girl who is headed nowhere.”

5. Fashion Sense

“The older I get, the more I understand the value of dressing well in order to feel good. Self-care is an important trait that I look for in the people I associate myself with.”

6. Emotional Intelligence

“I don’t want to have to put up with a woman who is selfish and who only has her own personal needs and desires in mind. She has to be mindful of my feelings and how she impacts the people around her as well.”

7. Reliability

“She needs to be reliable. She needs to be dependable. I only ever want to be with someone I can count on to be there for me whenever I need her. If she’s inconsistent; if she’s hot and cold, then I don’t want to be with her.” finding someone who embodies signs you’ve found your person goes beyond just reliability. It means being able to trust that they will stand by you in both good times and bad. When you share this level of understanding, it’s clear that your connection is something truly special.

8. Confidence

“At this point, I am so tired of having to date women I need to give ego boosts to every so often. I want to be with a woman who is confident enough to know her worth; someone who doesn’t need me to fluff her ego on a daily basis.”

9. Fearlessness

“A fearful woman is a woman who isn’t going to be able to make anything of herself. I need to be with a girl who isn’t afraid of taking risks and going on adventures with me. I am old but I still like to explore the unknown.”

10. Discipline

“Discipline is something that we really try to instill in children, but we fail to hold our romantic counterparts to. And I’m discovering just how important it is to be with someone who is disciplined enough to stay the course and make sure that everything is in line.”

11. Kindness

“I have met so many people in my life and I am of strong belief that there is very little kindness in this world. That’s why it’s important for me to be with someone who is genuinely kind; someone who understands the importance of always being nice to others.”

12. Physical Fitness

“I’m not getting any younger and I’m slowly starting to embrace my mortality. Fitness is becoming really important to me. And it’s also important for me to be with someone who takes fitness as seriously as I do.”

13. Sincerity

“I’m far too old and tired to be putting up with fake women. I want someone who is unafraid and unapologetic about being her true and genuine self.”

14. Independenc

“I’m not looking for a girl to babysit. I’m looking for a partner. And if she’s too clingy or dependent, then I don’t want anything to do with her.”

15. Passion

“There are very few things in this life that are more attractive than a person who is passionate about something. It could be anything that she’s passionate about really. She just has to let that passion really shine through.”

16. Success

“I’m really not interested in building a life with someone anymore. I want to be with someone whose life is already pretty much built. I’m done with the struggle. I’m here for the glory.”

17. Sobriety

“No more weekend binge-drinking for me. I’m so done with all of that. I want to be with someone who is over that phase of her life.”

18. Predictability

“I’m really so sick of surprises at this point. I just want a nice and predictable girl who isn’t going to surprise me anymore.”


23 Responses

23 Responses

J
Janie April 16, 2020

Seriously? Good luck finding all that when you so clearly have a huge ego problem. Wow! All you left out was height, weight and hair color. I wish you the best.

M
Me July 14, 2023

These are normal characteristics of being an adult. I’m confused why you’re offended.

D
Donna May 31, 2022

I agree, looking for a honest man.
No more drama needed. Wanting a wonderful relationship that I can count on when I need help and not n to urn I will be there for him.

C
Crystal September 24, 2022

The mature men polled for this article continuously refer to “girls” that they desire. Perhaps that’s your problem guys, you’re talking about girls when maybe you should be looking for women.

D
Dorian February 22, 2024

You are pretty right my dear

C
Colleen Jeffries January 27, 2023

My goodness he isn’t asking for much, is he?
You may count me out as an older women. I could never live up to your unrealistic expectations, and I don’t think very many other women can either.
Sir, good luck finding that woman you’re seeking.

M
Me February 12, 2023

I have all those qualities and want the same in a man but they don’t have any especially intelligence because men seem to crave for an eighteen year old.

S
Sandra April 16, 2023

What you seek from another, you should seek from within yourself first.

H
Hank June 14, 2024

My 51yr old Fiancée has them all!! That’s why I asked her to marry me after only seven months. With my own character well developed at 54yrs old we were checking off the green blocks very quickly, until it became clear the Universe had aligned us beautifully!

N
Nancy May 2, 2023

I think this is perfect…men should not have to sacrifice. I fit this description perfectly 😉

M
Melisa May 11, 2023

Yes!! I like it because I fit the description but also require the same 🤷‍♀️

S
Shellbug50 May 20, 2023

Get a chronic illness. Where most of the items are unobtainable. Then come talk to me

E
Estella June 22, 2023

Do you have all of these to begin with or you just need someone thats enough strong to handle your lack of stability, because thats not whats gonna happen, they will just leave.

Y
Yvie June 23, 2023

Sure, perhaps a little “personally weighted”, but all opinions count. Certainly sense your exasperation, frustration at your dating-past, and your experience is quite comprehensive. I do not wish anything incurable upon you. Long live romance, I hope you find what you are seeking.

M
Michelle Vibonese June 23, 2023

Actually, most of these sound pretty reasonable and are really just common sense. The number of defensive responses are interesting.

C
Carla July 13, 2023

All I hear is another ME – MYSELF and I…. Poor thing! Must be all the the things lacking in his own personality… There’s three types of things you see in another person.. – a mirror of yourself, a window of all the opportunities – what it could look like or – a door and that’s only when you did all the healing yourself when you need NOTHING from another person and can accept them unconditionally! Only then are you matured and ready for a relationship!! I would say Most men should keep on GROWING UP!!!

M
Me July 14, 2023

These are normal characteristics of being an adult. Women shouldn’t be offended, they should seek these qualities in a partner also.

T
T July 17, 2023

I really don’t understand the women that are offended by this post. I guess there are more women out there that don’t fit this description than I initially thought, and reading this they’re feeling inadequate. No reason to feel that way at all – this person simply is not a match for you and that’s okay; find someone that is. There’s nothing on this list for me that’s a surprise – I meet every one and expect the exact same (and some) in return. It’s important that persons are equally yoked in relationships. That had the best chance of success. But understand that yoking comes at different levels. Find someone at your level if you don’t meet these standards – simple.

J
Just a girl August 22, 2023

The amount of people who failed to grasp the fact that these are various statements from multiple men, is astonishing. It’s literally right there in the article title “18 older men reveal….”

Older does not mean old age.

Girl, is commonly used to simply describe female not only for age range or maturity.

I think the main issue is the people reading it fail to grasp the context of the conversation missed with its all to “real”, I’m sure many would be far less defensive if the the topics were more superficial and supportive of superficial things.

I’m a female in her 20’s and agree with these sorts of things on a personal level of what I myself look for in a partner.

Its no different than asking for honesty, loyalty or commitment. And far more meaningful than asking for a fun time person.

O
Olivia Q October 15, 2023

I am in my own awkward love life situation. Separated but not divorced legally. I met an older gentleman that I connect with spiritually and physically. We have been dating for 4 months and have had our handful of troubles. One I feel, is that my sweetheart feels pressured to perform. I feel ignored when I tell him that caressing and foreplay IS enough for me. But if I have to ask for it, I’m already upset, because I didn’t inspire you to do so on your own. I have tried checking off lists that men’s opinions create, like this. I try to go down the line and perform each required task, yet I still feel inadequate. At this point, I’m confused whether I’m not doing enough, or am I just not being appreciated? They seem opposite or maybe they cycle each other. Sorry for the long comment, I’m just really alone right now.

J
JR March 9, 2024

Same.

L
Leona May 17, 2024

This ” perfect woman” that the mature guys want will bore them to some point and it’s weird because most mature guys will go for women they want to control an who are free spirited.

S
S April 2, 2026

Seems to me like you trying to get her to tick all the boxes. You seeking perfection and that doesn’t exist . If women had to make the list you just did it would be double ! You can’t understand why women are offended by what YOU want? ( all while scratching your head in confusion ..)
If ONLY ‘older mature men ‘ had ALL those attributes !!!

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Abigail Renee
Written by
Abigail Renee

Abigail Renee is a writer based in New York with a background in psychology and over five years of experience covering relationships, love, and personal growth. She is known for her candid, thoughtful perspective on the complexities of modern relationships, and believes that honest conversation is the foundation of any meaningful connection. When she is not writing, she is exploring new restaurants, listening to Coldplay, or rewatching her favourite sitcoms from the 2000s.