Have you ever been with an extrovert?
We have all probably encountered at least one extroverted person at some point in our lives. You know who we’re talking about here. This is he person who you know to be the most adventurous and daring. This is an outgoing human being who is always up for doing something active. This is the person who wants to interact with other people as much as possible – always being the center of attention at parties, demanding the attention of a room, and just keeping the energy of a crowd alive. There are extroverts all over this world. And a lot of them get falsely accused for being conceited, self-absorbed, and selfish.
The truth is that not all of them are that way. There are plenty of introverted people who can be just as conceited, self-absorbed, and selfish. Those traits and qualities aren’t particularly exclusive to a specific kind of person. However, you are bound to run into a few extroverted people who are just downright terrible and they might end up tainting your view of extroverted people forever. And in some cases, you actually might end up falling in love with one. Regardless, if there is an extrovert in your life – and if that person has some kind of meaning to you, then there are a few important things that you really need to keep in mind about this person.
There are plenty of us in this world who just love to talk and express ourselves. However, it also gets to a point where we need to realize the value of listening and paying attention. There is great value in being able to just keep quiet and hear out whatever other people have to say about something. Extroverts find it so easy to express themselves. But a lot of them are also guilty of not giving other people the chance to speak. Introverts in particular find it incredibly difficult to just open up about their thoughts and feelings to other people. And the more considerate extroverts are the ones who always take the initiative to grant introverts the safe space that they need to feel comfortable about expressing themselves.
And it’s very important to make that distinction between the different kinds of extroverts – especially if you’re in a relationship with one. If you’re in a relationship with an extrovert who just happens to lack a sense of self-awareness, then that might be a little exhausting for you to deal with. Sure, you might be entertained with their animated personality and their charisma. But once they get tired of expressing themselves, the conversation stops and there’s no more time for you to get your say. The communication aspect of the relationship becomes one-sided and you’re the one who ends up on the losing end.
Let’s say you have an interesting anecdote or an enticing piece of information that you want to share, a considerate extrovert is going to allow you to express yourself without interrupting you. However, there are also those less considerate extroverts who won’t hesitate to take over those conversations in a hostile manner. They will end up outshining you and they don’t even know that they are hurting you in the process. It’s just how they naturally are and they don’t think that there’s anything wrong with what they’re doing.
So yes, being in a relationship with an extrovert isn’t as cracked up as it might seem to be. But, it doesn’t have to be all bad either. You just have to make sure that you equip yourself with the proper information that you need to understand your extroverted partner better. At the end of the day, the goal is for the both of you to develop some kind of understanding for one another anyway. That’s how you get closer to each other. And the better that you understand each other, the easier it will be for your relationship to grow and prosper; the easier it will be for the two of you to share your lives together. Here are a few important things that you need to know when you’re in a relationship with an extrovert:
1. They will always be drawn to hogging the spotlight.
This is where you need to discover your role in the relationship. Do you want to share the spotlight with them or are you more of a background person? You need to be able to communicate your needs to one another so that you can understand each other better.
2. They have a constant need for attention from you and everyone else.
They will come off as needy a lot. Keep in mind that they are very social creatures and they draw energy from social interactions. If you leave them alone, they can grow very restless and uneasy.
3. They can be inconsistent with how they express their love for you.
Because of an extrovert’s need to be liked by everyone, it might seem that they aren’t being exclusive to you. This is where you need to step in and draw the line. Let them know that you need more consistency and security from them in your relationship.
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Have you been in this position? Talk to me in the comments below!