It’s been said time and time again but plenty of people all over the world still refuse to accept it as truth. Openness and honesty is absolutely essential in a relationship. And vulnerability and authenticity doesn’t necessarily have to convey weakness.
In fact, part of being a well-liked and successful man is being able to acknowledge his own personal insecurities and bring them out into the open. It takes a man of great strength to be able to recognize his own personal weaknesses.
Only the weak and insecure are the ones who deliberately move mountains just to keep everything that they have bottled up inside. They will not want to confront what’s inside of them because they are afraid of what they’ll find. It really pays to be introspective and honest with what you might be feeling or thinking. At the very least, you owe it to yourself to just be real. You can’t be lying to yourself – of all people.
It makes perfect sense for men to embrace the idea of openness and honesty; and yet, a lot of them still refuse to do it. At first glance, you might assume that it’s because men are typically bred to think that feelings are signs of weakness – that somehow, robotic behavior is really what strength is all about. But that’s completely archaic thinking and that’s the kind of mentality that just gets people into trouble with other people.
The world can do without all of the unnecessary insensitivity. There are so many relationships that get destroyed – not because the love was wrong – but because the men just couldn’t find it in themselves to open up to their partners. And it’s downright unfortunate. Because openness and honesty aren’t necessary things that are beyond a human being’s control.
A person can always just choose to be more open and honest to another person. There is nothing that can restrain a person from being transparent about how they feel if they wanted to. It’s all really just brought about by fear and misguided thinking. And it’s sad how so many perfectly fine relationships have to wither and die just because of these unresolved issues concerning openness and honesty.
Here’s why it’s so important for men to just allow themselves to be vulnerable and open to their female counterparts: when two people get into a relationship together, it’s absolutely essential that they try to get as close to one another as possible. And when one party refuses to open up and be vulnerable to the other, it shows a certain disconnect and a lack of trust there. That can’t be the case. In order for a love to be healthy, there must always be complete trust, authenticity, and honesty. Without these basic foundations, a relationship will never prosper.
But still, some men might just find it a little to hard. And if you’re wondering why that’s the case, here are some real-life testimonials from men who are afraid of opening up:
I’m scared that I’ll be judged for how I feel – Felix, 30
In this case, it shows how fear can really drive a man to be very closed off and distant in relationships. It’s not that he doesn’t necessarily want to open up just because he was taught not to. He doesn’t want to open up because he is afraid of how he is going to feel after he does open himself up. He doesn’t want to get hurt by realizing that he is being judged and criticized for putting himself out there.
I am too afraid of having my feelings invalidated and rejected – Mark, 27
With Mark’s case, he is also crippled by fear. But it’s not the fear of criticism or judgment that applies to Mark’s situation. It’s more of a fear of rejection and invalidation. Mark doesn’t want to bring his feelings out into the open because he’s afraid that someone might make him feel like his emotions are invalid.
We have always been taught since our earliest years that we have to just man up. – Carlo, 31
Carlo is one of those men who have just been brainwashed since they were kids to think that opening up is a sign of weakness. And even though he’s a thinking man now, he still carries that belief with him because it’s ingrained in his system.
I don’t know why men don’t open up – I just know that they typically don’t. – Gian, 23
Gian is just as confused as we are about this. This is a classic case of herd mentality. Gian just knows that men around him don’t typically like to open up about their feelings – and so he feels that he needs to be the same way if he wants to fit in.
I just don’t like putting myself in a position of weakness – Jason, 29
And Jason just wrongly believes that opening up about your feelings means that you are making yourself weak.
Men, talk to me in the comments below!