How many of these are you guilty of?
We are all familiar with this method of social interaction. We’ve witness or experienced it at least once at some point in our lives. The art of playing cool is a very old technique that human beings have been using since the early days of courtship. People will try to feign disinterest in another person in an effort to test just how far that person is willing to go to earn someone’s affections. In some cases, it may work; considering that a lot of people still use that technique today. But there are also plenty of cases wherein it doesn’t work. You just have to be able to pick your spots properly. You can’t just assume that this method of courtship is going to work a hundred percent of the time. There is a proper time and place for everything and you’re just going to have to accept that this is not a surefire method of winning over someone’s heart.
Sure, we understand the appeal. You want to play coy and shy so as to maintain that lure of mystery and curiosity. You want to keep someone on a leash by choosing not to reveal all your cards. You also don’t want to put yourself in a vulnerable position of having another person know your true feelings and intentions. But all of this may come at a price. Some people just don’t respond well to you playing it cool. If you’re not careful, you may end up missing out on the experience of having a real loving relationship with a person because you just played it a little too cool. Here are a few possible scenarios wherein playing it too cool might not work out the way that you want it to.
1. When you tell him that you don’t want to talk about something even though you do.
No relationship could possibly survive without open and honest communication. If you want to talk about something with him, you should. Stop trying to play it cool and act like he’s not worthy of your words. He is going to get upset at the thought of you not wanting to converse with him. He is going to feel bad that you don’t like talking to him. Always make sure that he feels like you want him to be able to listen to what you have to say.
2. When you tell him that you don’t care even though you really do care.
You act like it doesn’t affect you even though it really does. If you want to be in a relationship with someone, you must always learn to practice full honesty. If you are unable to do so early in the relationship, then at least let your man understand that it will take time for them to earn your trust. You have to always be honest about how you are feeling. You have to be able to tell him whenever something upsets or pleases you. You can’t keep him in the dark if you want him to be in your life.
3. When you try to make him jealous.
This is another old trick that women like to use on men. They will act like they have other suiters and love interests as a way of testing a man’s true intentions for her. However, what you have to understand is that not all men are cut from the same cloth. While some men would rise to the challenge and say they are willing to compete for your love, other men won’t be as bold. So if you don’t want to risk losing a man you like just because he’s not necessarily one who is willing to compete with others, you should refrain from using this technique.
4. When you pretend to be someone that you’re not just to impress him.
You play it to cool and you try to act like you’re somebody that you’re not in an effort to win his affections. You pretend to be really into this particular movie or book because you think that’s the kind of thing that he looks for in a girl. Eventually, your lies will unravel and everything will backfire on you. Better be honest from the get-go and just hope that things will turn out alright.
5. When you keep on rejecting him even though he is interested.
If you like him, then let him know. Stop rejecting him over and over again. Tell him that you’re actually interested in him as well. Not all men are built to be resilient. People have pride as well. It’s a huge blow to a person’s ego to get rejected. Imagine the emotional trauma of being rejected multiple times. Not many men are able to endure such experiences on a consistent basis. Throw him a bone and actually accept his gestures of courtship.
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How many of these are you guilty of? Let me know in the comments below!