As a woman, you are always told that you need to favor the nice guy over the bad boy. And it makes sense, right? The bad boy might seem like the kind of man who you would have a lot of fun with. He might be the more exciting and interesting choice. But he also has a reputation for being the guy who would only break your heart and leave you out to dry. He’s the kind of guy who would eventually just bring a lot of pain into your life. And you want to be able to protect yourself from that. You want to stay guarded. You want to make the right choice.
And here comes the nice guy.
He’s the one that your mom always encourages you to date. He’s the one that your girlfriends root for as your prospective romantic partner. It makes a lot of sense to date the nice guy instead of the bad boy. He might not be as exciting, but at least you know what you can expect out of him. He might not be as fun to be with, but he isn’t going to be as stressful or as toxic either. He might not be serving as an exciting challenge for you, but he isn’t going to make your life more complicated than it has to be.
That’s why it makes more sense to be with a nice guy. Right?
Well, not necessarily. Yes, you want to be with a genuinely nice man. However, there are so many men out there who are parading themselves as nice guys even though deep down inside, they are something completely different. They are far more dangerous than bad boys. They aren’t going to be so blatantly terrible so that it would be easier for them to gain the trust of the women that they’re with. But ultimately, they can be just as toxic and destructive.
There are a lot of myths surrounding nice men that all women should be privy to. You should never subject yourself to the potential abuse of these seemingly nice guys. And that means that you need to refrain from being gullible and weak. Here are a few myths about nice guys that you probably shouldn’t believe if you know what’s good for you.
1. You owe all nice guys a chance.
Not necessarily. Not everyone is going to be deserving of getting a chance with you. No one is entitled to being with you. You still get to choose who you want to be with and spend time with. You shouldn’t have to give all nice guys a chance because they think they are deserving of it.
2. Nice guys always get stuck in the friend zone.
You should never feel pressured to actually become romantic with a nice guy just because he’s nice. If you only see him as a friend, then that should be enough for him. Don’t feel compelled to be anything more just because you think he shouldn’t be subjected to the friend zone.
3. Nice guys are really hard to find.
Nice guys are actually everywhere! They’re not too hard to find at all. There are so many genuinely nice guys in the world. However, what is hard is to distinguish these genuinely nice guys from the fake ones. You just need to know how to make that distinction and it’s going to be easy.
4. Only nice guys would take notice of you.
Just because you see yourself as a very nice girl doesn’t mean that only nice guys are going to be interested in you. There are a lot of “fake” nice guys out there who will be looking to take advantage of a genuinely nice girl like you. And you need to stay wary of these kinds of men if you want to protect yourself.
5. Being decent makes a person nice.
Don’t lower your standards. It’s no secret that we live in a very patriarchal society that is dominated by men everywhere. However, that doesn’t mean that you should subject yourself to the dominance of these men. Just because they act decently towards you doesn’t mean that they’re nice people. There’s a difference between being decent and being a genuinely nice person.
6. Nice guys are always going to be genuinely nice.
Again, just because you happen to meet a guy who seems to be nice doesn’t mean that he’s automatically going to be that way at all times. It’s so easy to just put on an act. It’s so easy to just feign niceties in an effort to get people to do what you want them to do. Genuine nice men are nice because they’re just wired to be that way. But fake nice guys are the ones who are nice because they want something.