Before you think about getting into a relationship, give this a read.
Often, one of our biggest faults as human beings is expecting too much from other people even when we don’t necessarily have the right to do so. This is especially true when we start to think about getting into relationships with others. We often set the expectations a little too high and as a result, we come out feeling unfulfilled and disappointed when they aren’t met. But that’s also not entirely our fault either. We’ve been exposed to so many false narratives presented to us by movies, books, and TV shows about how perfect love is supposed to be even when the truth is far from it.
And that’s the thing. The reason why a lot of us get disappointed with the relationships that we get into is because we aren’t necessarily taught about the right things we can expect from these relationships. It’s always important to have a clear and truthful perspective of relationships as we go into them. Otherwise, we are only blinding ourselves with our unreasonable expectations and so we don’t really get to experience love the way that it’s supposed to be experienced.
We have to remember that it takes two mature individuals for a relationship to work. And part of being mature is being able to have mature dispositions going into a relationship. And we can’t have mature dispositions if we continue to allow false information to control our systems. So if you want to have a more mature perspective going into new relationships, then you might want to read on until the end of this article.
1. Expectations are good. But they have to be reasonable.
It’s not a sin to have expectations going into relationships. in fact, it’s good to have expectations. When you have expectations, it means that you have direction. It means that you know what you want out of love and out of life. And with expectations, you have a rubric by which you can measure the worth of your relationship on. However, with expectations, you must also practice practicality and reason. You can’t have unreasonable expectations with the people you get into relationships with because then, no one will ever be good enough for you and you will never find fulfilment in any relationship you find yourself in.
2. You can’t expect everyone to be like you.
Just because you would handle a certain situation in a certain manner doesn’t mean that other people would do the same. You are your own person but you aren’t the center of the universe. Other people have their own lives and their own ideologies their own set of rules that they abide by in life. And they don’t necessarily always align with yours.
3. A person’s behavior is often very much influenced by how they feel.
Always factor in how emotions impact a person’s manner of acting towards you. Just because they treat you badly one day doesn’t mean that they are terrible people. It could just mean that they are dealing with some difficult things emotionally.
4. You are going to get disappointed and that’s okay.
Even if your expectations are perfectly fine and reasonable, it’s still possible for you to get disappointed. Brace yourself for disappointment and don’t let it be an instant deal-breaker for your relationships.
5. You are dealing with an imperfect human being.
You are never going to meet a perfect person in your whole life. So expect them to not always be on their A-game. We all have our weaknesses and we all stumble every once in a while. But we all deserve forgiveness to some extent. So be patient with whoever you choose to get with.
6. Gender differences are real.
Just because you love one another doesn’t mean that you will be able to eliminate gender differences. Don’t be so deluded as to think that your love would get rid of differences. What love can do is help you overcome these differences in your relationship.
7. Unreasonable standards can only lead to further disappointment.
Of course, you would never want to dignify something that is beneath you. You know your own worth and you understand that you should never settle for less than what you deserve. However, there is also such a thing as having standards that are just too high. You can’t expect to not be disappointed if your standards in a relationship are unreasonable. You must also learn to be more adaptable and flexible with your standards.
8. Kindness is of the utmost importance.
Always be kind. That is the most important thing that you could ever be in a relationship. You shouldn’t be playing with the people you’re getting into relationships with. You should never be looking to deceive or manipulate anyone. You must always have noble intentions and you must always have a kind heart. And if people aren’t kind to you in return, don’t be afraid to walk away. But you shouldn’t be giving people a reason to walk away from you.
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