If a guy is actually worthy of your love, then he would never even for a second allow you to think that you would be so much better off if you weren’t together. But on the flipside, a guy who never really loved you the way that you deserved to be love isn’t a guy who is even worthy of your time. He most definitely isn’t worth your tears and regret. Yes, a breakup isn’t going to be easy to go through. In fact, it might be one of the most difficult emotional experiences you ever have to go through in your life. However, you should know that it’s a lot easier to deal with breakups if you actually see the relationship for what it is.
As human beings, we have a tendency to be nostalgic creatures. And that means we always tend to look back and remember the good times. We think about all the happy memories and we blind ourselves to all the bad stuff. However, that can’t be the case. You have to look at your relationship for what it truly was. And when you open your eyes to all the bad stuff, moving on becomes a whole lot easier. Remember that you guys broke up for a reason (or maybe even two or three) and you just need to remind yourself of those reasons whenever you feel yourself slipping.
1. His love always came with conditions.
When you get into a relationship with someone, you always want to make sure that that person loves you for who you really are and not just what they want you to be. That means a person has to love you wholeheartedly and unconditionally. Love is not love that alters when alteration finds. Shakespeare said that. You shouldn’t have to cry tears over a man whose love altered.
2. He was never supportive of your dreams.
Just because you get into a relationship with someone doesn’t mean you have to give up on your dreams. You still have to be able to fight for your dreams. You still have to go after the things that you want to go after. And your partner should be supportive of that. Yes, you should leave some room for compromise. But you should never have to give your dreams up entirely.
3. He was only ever really concerned about his own needs.
A relationship should always be about a give and take. It’s never something that is one-sided and parasitic. The both of you have to be willing to meet each other’s needs and expectations. And that comes with a healthy exchange of effort and mutual love. You always have to be communicating with one another. But he always made you feel like he wasn’t interested in listening to you.
4. He never showed a hope for change.
He was always doing so many things wrong to you in a relationship. And typically, that would be okay. No one is perfect after all. There is always room for a few mistakes here and there. However, the problem with him is that he never showed a willingness to learn from his mistakes. He was always just doing everything wrong without any remorse.
5. He never kept his promises.
He was a guy who you could just never grow to trust. He never really lived up to any of the things that he said. He would make all sorts of promises to you but he would never really follow up on them. He would make all sorts of commitments to you but he would never really live up to them. His word practically meant nothing in the relationship. You could never rely on him.
6. He never really made you feel appreciated in the relationship.
He was always just doing his own thing in the relationship. And it seemed as if he was completely indifferent to your presence. He was so unappreciative of your efforts. He never really did anything to make you feel like he valued everything that you were to him. He never really made an effort to make you feel special.
7. He never really made you feel included in his vision of the future.
Whenever you tried t bring up the idea of the future, he always shrugged you off. Whenever he made plans in his life, he never made you feel included. He never consulted you. He was always just doing his own thing as if your voice and opinion never mattered. He never acted like you had a spot in his future at all.
8. You were really the only one putting in the effort in the relationship.
Remember that it takes two people to make a relationship work. If you were the only one who was working in the relationship, then it was never going to work out. You deserve a partner who shares the responsibilities of the relationship with you.