Some people just are’t cut off for the long-term game.
When it comes to relationships, everyone’s end game is always going to be something leaning towards the long-term kind. No mature individual would want to waste too much time with temporary flings when it comes to love. A lot of us are always searching for that steady, consistent, and stable kind of relationship that one could actually build a future upon.
The difficulty is in finding a partner with whom you are compatible enough to actually have a long-term relationship with. Sure, you won’t necessarily get love right the first time but that’s okay. Just remember that the clock is ticking and you can’t afford to keep getting yourself tied into a temporary relationship with a guy who just isn’t willing to go all the way with you.
You can avoid wasting time in these doomed relationships by trying to spot the signs early on. If you are vigilant and quick enough to spot these red flags, maybe you can save yourself the trouble of getting invested in a relationship that is headed towards failure anyway. When you get caught in a sketch relationship like this, just walk away and move on to the next one. Remember that you must always make sure to keep an eye out for these signs right at the onset of the relationship.
1. You never feel like you could trust him.
He never gives you a reason to trust him. Somehow, he always manages to make you feel uneasy and insecure about the whole relationship. You feel like he’s sketchy and that he’s hiding something from you somehow. You feel like he’s never giving you the whole reveal and that you are constantly being kept in the dark.
2. He doesn’t like to put labels on your relationship.
He doesn’t like giving labels to what you are because he doesn’t really want to commit to you. He is going to avoid all talks of labels with you to absolve himself of any form of legitimate commitment to you. He doesn’t want to stay loyal to you. He isn’t looking to commit to this relationship (if you could call it that). He is only looking to play around and have some fun.
3. He has lingering addiction problems.
Addiction is a mental health issue and that needs to be addressed. You can’t afford to build a long-term relationship on a foundation that is constantly plagued by issues that concern addiction. It could be an addiction to drugs, alcohol, gambling, or sex; whatever it is, it is destructive to any relationship and it has to be resolved before you even have a chance at going all the way.
4. He avoids having deep conversations with you.
If he’s really serious about you, then he should be mature enough to have deep and difficult conversations with you. He has to be willing to talk to you about anything. You can’t be content with dating a guy who only resorts to small talk. He has to be able to discuss his hopes, dreams, expectations, and feelings with you even when it makes him uncomfortable to do so.
5. He objectifies you constantly.
He treats you like some sort of object or a prize that he’s won. He doesn’t see you as his equal in the relationship. He doesn’t even treat you like the human being that you deserve to be treated. He brandishes you like a medal and uses you for pleasure whenever he wants.
6. He chooses to spend more time with his friends than with you.
He deprioritizes you even now in the relationship. You can’t expect that to change going deeper. He’s always going to be like that. If he doesn’t value you now, then you might as well get out and find a man who is actually going to value you the way that you deserve to be. If he is spending more time with his friends than with you, it also shows that he isn’t taking this relationship as seriously as he should.
7. He is irresponsible with his money.
You don’t want to be dating a little boy who goes around buying all the toys he wants without saving for the future. You want to be dating a man who understands the value of money and the importance of financial responsibility. A long-term relationship can be rocked by a number of different issues and you can bet that money is one of them. So many relationships are destroyed by money problems and you want to get that out of the way early on.
8. He doesn’t really have any plans or direction in life.
Lastly, you can’t expect to build a long-term relationship with a man who doesn’t think in the long-term. You can only build a long-term relationship with someone who actually has plans for the future; someone who actually has direction in life. You have to be with someone who is always looking forward and has an eye for the future.