How awkward was your first date?
First dates can be incredibly daunting and intimidating social situations. There is just no denying or suppressing the awkwardness that comes with dating a person for the first time. You are putting yourself out there but you don’t want to make yourself too vulnerable. You don’t want to come off as too strong but you also don’t want your date to feel like you’re disinterested. You try to be as interesting as much as possible but you don’t want to show all your cards on the first night. A first date is practically a balancing act and you have to be precise without being too stuck up or tightly wound.
Fortunately for you, you aren’t going to be the first person to ever go out on the first dates. There have been millions of first dates throughout history and we’ve practically got it locked down as a species already. If you are looking to circumvent the awkwardness that comes with first dates, then do yourself a favor and follow some of these steps.
1. Don’t make it a night full of small talk.
Avoid small talk as much as possible. It’s going to make the date very boring and you’re going to come off as the most uninteresting person in the world. Don’t be afraid to go deep and actually talk about meaningful things. Go into detail about your passions in life. Talk about your favorite hobbies, books, movies, and other things that make you tick. Talk about the dreams you have for yourself and your personal goals in life.
2. Make a genuine effort to be interested in the person you’re dating.
Don’t just keep on babbling and talking about yourself. Another way to avoid small talk is to get your date talking about deep and meaningful topics too. Ask your date about goals and dreams. And always make sure that you are actually paying attention. Make sure to ask some questions here and there and express a genuine interest. This is also a good way for you to gauge your compatibility as a couple.
3. Be sober.
Don’t go making the mistake of taking a few shots or swigging a few beers before a date. You will want to be operating with full control of your senses. You always want to be on top of your game and you can’t afford to have alcohol impair your better judgement. Also, whenever you start talking about deep and meaningful topics, alcohol may end up betraying you. Lastly, you never know when you might end up drinking on a date together. If you do, then you’ll be at a disadvantage.
4. Go to your friends and family for some motivation.
If you’re desperate for some courage and motivation, you don’t have to turn towards alcohol. You can go to your friends and family. They would be more than willing to pump you up and give you some much needed advice for your first date. Always remember that your loved ones will always have your back and they will always wish the best for you.
5. Don’t text your date too much beforehand.
It can be tempting to text your date and know more about one another before the actual first date. But you’re going to have to suppress that temptation. Don’t give in. If you keep on texting each other before you actually meet, then you might be exhausting valuable conversation topics that you could use for the first date. Make sure that you save enough room for conversation on the actual date. Don’t waste all your ice breakers on text messages. Otherwise, you are going to have to revert to small talk on the actual date.
6. Go easy on the alcohol during the actual date.
Don’t go drinking too much. Remember that you are on a first date with someone and you don’t want to say things that you will end up regretting. Alcohol has a way of getting the best out of our better judgement. That’s why when you choose to go drinking on a date, make sure to keep things casual. Stick to maybe one or two drinks at most. Anything more, and you’re just asking for trouble.
7. Keep that phone in your pocket.
Don’t you dare bring that phone out in the middle of your date. Give your date some proper respect. Devote all of your attention to your date and to the conversations that you’re having. It’s a big turn off if you start scrolling through your social media feeds in the middle of dinner. It will make your date feel like you are disinterested and rude. The moment you bring that phone out, you are diminishing your chances for a second date.
8. Let loose and just let the chips fall where they may.
Just stop thinking about it too much. Be casual. It’s the first date. Don’t be too tightly wound. Be natural and be yourself. Don’t try to force the issue.
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How awkward was your first date? Let me know in the comments below!