Have you ever been ghosted?
Being ghosted is not a new phenomenon, but its prevalence in media these days has been rapidly growing. Perhaps it’s because victims of ghosting situations have found new platforms for them to be able to express their frustrations as a result of being ghosted. In any case, whatever the reason for its rise in popularity, it is never an easy thing to have to go through. It can be very hard for even the most optimistic people to find the good parts of being victimized by ghosting. For the people who are victims of ghosting, they can often find it difficult to ever trust other people ever again. Ghosting can often taint a person’s views on love and romance forever. It also has the power to destroy a person’s sense of self-esteem and confidence.
For those who don’t know, being Ghosted means that you were left hanging in a relationship without any explanation or prior notice. It means that a person who once meant so much to you just suddenly chose to disappear like a ghost would. It can be painful having to bear that kind of emotional trauma. The weight of uncertainty can do so much damage to person’s mind. It can trigger so much stress and anxiety. But it’s very important that if you ever become a victim of ghosting, you can’t allow the experience to break you. You can’t let yourself become crippled and paralyzed into being nothing. You can’t allow yourself to self-destruct just because someone chose to be insensitive enough to desert you without explanation.
The road to recovery is going to be tough, but you can’t let it intimidate you. And by all means, always try your best to maintain your dignity and your pride in these situations. Here are 9 things that you should always avoid doing after being ghosted by someone.
1. Don’t text that person.
You tried texting that person when they suddenly ghosted you. You never got a reply. They never responded to your text. They wanted to erase themselves completely from your grid. Don’t give them the satisfaction that you’re still chasing after them. Accept that you’ve been ghosted and just learn to move on.
2. Don’t call that person.
Same reasons as the previous item, but more importantly, they don’t deserve to hear your voice. You might think you would be able to pressure them into picking up, but they’re just not worth the effort anymore at this point.
The world shouldn’t have to know about your grief and your sadness. You can confide in your closest friends but you shouldn’t be letting everyone on your social network know about your unfortunate situation. It will only make you look petty and desperate.
4. Don’t let yourself cry in public.
Crying in public is essentially the same as broadcasting your sadness on your social media feeds. While it’s okay to cry, you should do it on your own time in private or in the presence of only your most trusted friends and family. You don’t have to let the entire crowded caf see you bear with your emotional trauma.
5. Don’t let the anger get to you.
You are going to be angry. You are going to hate that you have been placed in such an embarrassing and compromising position. But hey, it happens. It’s just unfortunate that it happened to you. So what you need to do is to find an outlet for all of your anger and your frustrations. Channel all of that negative energy into something productive.
6. Don’t take them back if they make a sudden reappearance in your life.
On the off chance that they decide to walk back into your life, just ignore them. Don’t give them any sort of satisfaction. Don’t be kind to them. Be cold. Don’t welcome them back into your life not because you’re still harboring anger but because you have to make them realize that what they did was wrong; and that there are repercussions to their actions.
7. Don’t let it consume you and just learn to move on.
The worst possible thing that you could do in this situation is to do nothing. You can’t let your circumstances cripple you into becoming nothing. You have to move on with your life and you have to be able to build on yourself despite the fact that you’ve just been ghosted by someone.
8. Don’t let this situation deprive you of happiness.
Happiness. That’s the ultimate goal in anyone’s life. If you let this situation deprive you of happiness, then you have already lost. Choose to be a winner. Choose to always pursue happiness in spite of the hardships that may come your way. Always choose to be happy even when others aren’t kind to you.
Talk to me
Have you been in this position? Talk to me in the comments below!
A guy best friend used to share everything with me even family problems talk the whole day but now doesn’t text back let alone text first though he is online most times
The same thing happened to me and I am devastated. He used to say how important our friendship was, and that he always makes a point to stay in touch with the people who matter. Now, it is dead silence. I don’t matter anymore and he won’t even say why. I was only ever nice to him. Always available when he needed me. Now, I am just trash. I wish I was dead.
I get ghosted (albeit) mini ghostings from the woman I am current seeing (when I see her)
If I pay her a compliment, I never get one back, she also wont respond, any gesture toward love and she disappears for days.
She will go a week without texting or a call, everyone is not so busy they can’t give a one sentence text per day, even if
it’s to say I am busy.
When we do talk, she is 50 btw, I am few years younger, she has been after two years, suddenly insulting of my appearance,
things that have been there since birth, things she was fine with two years ago.
Sounds like she lost interest in you, I wouldn’t give her the time of day if she’s putting down. She’s obviously mean. Not attractive!
I feel like I just had a good talk from a best friend. I needed this more than anything. Thanks!
Thank you 🙂
I dono what to say, he did that many times, still i take him in… he is bipolar and i do understand why he do that even if i dont deserve that. i wish i could be not so empathetic, i kinda understand his avoidance to conflicts which disturbs his mind, which i too dont want to happen… so i think this will go on and on till he completely given up.. . like this time…he blocked me. end of the story.
I met someone last month, that I came to really like. I felt this crazy connection between us, and we spent some amazing time together. Last week he just disappeared, stopped answering messages, and completely ghosted me. I’ve been wondering what to do, text, not text..reading your article made me realize this is on him, not me. I’m walking away with my dignity. Thankyou.
I’m 6 months pregnant and the baby’s father’s ghosted me.
After a year together and growing with the kids we already have… I feel empty.
There were promises of being together. There were promises of living together. Discussions of marriage. He’s 46 years old. Has 3 daughters already. Two older one is 9. My son is 8, and they bonded. I’ve bonded with his daughter. I feel stupid, I feel insignificant, I feel unwanted and unloved. He’s not even in the same state anymore. He’s 1000 miles away with no return in sight. I’ve wasted time money and emotions. I have very little positivity left inside me.
Thank you I needed this. My husband of 40 years has ghosted me may 26 this year. Havent heard from him, no text no calls nothing. He has a mental illness. Scared my kids and I rather badly. Once we found him and know he’s ok. Kids have been in contact w him but nothing to me. I texted once when we found him may 27. But I have not nor will I . It hurts to be treated this way. I get angry at myself for missing him. 40 years is almost my entire life. We were 17/18 when we met. I’m 57. Life has been rough with him. There will be no reconciliation. I won’t be treated this way. Love him or no he can stay with his sister for the rest of his life. Let her take care of him.
And yes there are times I am very angry, most times feel like I do not deserve happiness or love
I was talking to a guy all last week, now I haven’t heard from him since Saturday. I will not txt him and I won’t be there if he decides to get bc intouch..
There’s this famous Dj I met in a party. We both exchanged attention and slowly he made me feel like he was also into me and started ignoring other girls near his booth unlike before. One night, after we came out of the party, he texted me while going home that we should meet the next evening. He also asked me to call him when I reach home giving me his number. I went home and called him. He sounded so loving and asked me to call him next day by 5/6 pm so that he gets done with his shoot and we meet. Apparently he didn’t receive my call. 2 days later I texted him that why did he ask to meet if he didn’t actually want to? He said sorry and added he didn’t get the call and then right away said he wanted to meet me the next day. I said I wasn’t sure since I had work. He also asked me to call him in the next morning. But I didn’t, I called him at night wanting to explain that I was so busy since morning. But he gave me a screen shot showing that he asked me to call in the morning and not at night. Ever since we haven’t talked much. He has been playing at shows. But I’m so upset over here thinking if I lost a chance to meet the person I liked so much. I don’t know how to fix this but I can’t deal with this sorrow. It’s drowning me😞
The guy i was with for three years just ghosted me he left three months ago and we kinda stayed in touch up till three weeks ago he blocked me from everything without any closure he just disappeared like a ghost i still miss him very much though
There is this odd connection between him and me. You know when I think I am not good enough and that he doesn’t want me. He texts me I miss you and. Stuff.. when I do ask him if he have feelings for me, he says am not sure. I don’t know whether to forget or to wait. Help please….
My husband is a plumber and is often all too cosy with his female clients and when I find out about them, he goes no contact with them. He does that several times a year. He falls in love easily. He s also a liar. Every time I find out about it he has to ghost them….Sometimes they re very persistent and keep chasing and texting and calling for several years. He leads them on and then drops them like a stone.
This was done to me by a woman I love very much. I realized I fell in love with her, and she spoke to me briefly told me she had started seeing someone else. I made the Mistake of begging her to come back until she ghosted me altogether. Now she has the man she is worth watching my Facebook page. I am trying to move on, but it is difficult. I know her current relationship will Fail. It’s just so hard.