9 Expectations That You Shouldn’t Have Going Into A Marriage
When you go into a marriage, it’s only natural for you to have a few expectations of your husband. And in fact, expectations are healthy. They can help create a sense of accountability in the relationship. You just have to make sure that you are keeping your expectations clear, honest, and reasonable. And this article, in particular, is going to focus on the idea of having REASONABLE expectations in a marriage. You can’t just be having totally unreasonable expectations if you want your relationship to last.
Take note that your partner is only human. There is only so much that he can do to make you happy. He isn’t going to be perfect. But if he’s trying his best, then that should be enough if the love that you have for one another is pure.
If you want to know what kind of expectations are okay for you to have in your relationship, then this article can be of substantial help to you. Even if you’re just looking to gain more perspective on what roles you and your husband should be playing in your marriage, then just continue to read on until the end.
Here are a few expectations that you shouldn’t have going into a marriage.
1. You expect him to choose you over his mother.
His mother gave birth to him and brought him into his world. His mother raised him into the man that he is today. You don’t have the right to tell him to give up on his mother for the sake of having you. You shouldn’t be putting your man in a position like that.
2. You expect him to act like a girlfriend.
You have your girlfriends and they are always there for you whenever you want to gossip and talk about girl things. And you also want to turn to your husband for these things as well. But you can’t expect him to automatically be able to relate to you on everything. He’s still a guy and a lot of these girls’ issues might still be alien to him.
3. You expect him to never find other women attractive.
He’s a man with eyes and an independent brain. He is going to find other women attractive. You can’t be so naïve to think that you are the only attractive woman on this earth. It should be okay for him to find other girls pretty. But it’s another thing entirely whenever he starts acting on his feelings for these women though.
4. You expect him to be willing to give up his passions.
You should never be so willing to let your guy just give up on the things that he is passionate about in life. Remember that his passions contribute to making him who he is. Remember that it’s all a part of his personality. Just because you don’t have an interest in the things he is passionate about doesn’t give you the right to tell him to give them up.
5. You expect him to be someone other than who he is.
You can never force a guy to be someone other than who he is. You married this particular individual. You committed to him. And it’s unreasonable for you to expect him to be anyone other than who he truly is. You shouldn’t be expecting him to change into someone else who would be more convenient for you to have.
You should still be able to have your own independent circles of friends. It’s okay for you to not like a few of his friends. You don’t have to like all of them. But that doesn’t give you the right to tell him who he gets to be friends with and who he should be cutting out of his life.
7. You expect him to take note of every single aspect of your relationship.
He’s only human. He’s going to have lapses. Some things are going to slip his mind every now and then. Don’t be too hard on him whenever that happens.
8. You expect him to share in all of your interests.
Remember that you are both still separate individuals even though you are in a relationship together. Just because the two of you have gotten married doesn’t mean that you’re automatically going to look at the world in the same way. You are both still entitled to having your own individual and unique interests.
9. You expect him to always make the adjustments for you.
This isn’t going to be how a marriage is supposed to look like at all. You can’t expect him to always be adjusting to you. You must also be willing to meet him halfway. You need to show him that you are flexible enough to accommodate him into your life. You can’t be the center of attention in your own relationship.