Pistanthrophobia. What is it? And is it really important that you should know what it is? Well, in a nutshell, yes. Pistanthrophobia, to put it simply, is a person’s fear of trusting other people. This inability or reluctance to trust others is most often brought about by traumatic experiences in a person’s past that have involved betrayal or abuse of some kind.
These traumatic experiences could have triggered substantially negative responses to relationships and interactions with other people in general. And unfortunately for those who are experiencing this phobia, it can be very hard to find stability and consistency and relationships. The reason that this phobia is significant in romance is because it’s absolutely essential for two people in love to trust one another. When there is no trust in a relationship,
then it can be very hard for two people to establish a sense of intimacy and closeness to each other. Part of being in an intimate relationship is having two people who are willing to make themselves vulnerable to each other. And that vulnerability always comes with a sense of trust. You can never allow yourself to become vulnerable to anyone unless you trust them. If you feel like you’re a person who is bombarded with pistanthrobia, then it’s very important for you to be able to address your trust issues right away.
Otherwise, it is highly unlikely that you are ever going to be able to find success in your love life. If you let your fears of trusting others consume you, then you will never really allow yourself to get lose to another person. So how do you know if you’re a person who is really afflicted with this very real phobia? Here are a few signs that you could be on the lookout for:
1. You just assume that every person you meet is going to hurt you.
You seem to think that every single person in the world is evil and that they all exist to hurt you. You shouldn’t be so quick to assume such things. There are going to be some people like yourself who wouldn’t want to hurt a fly. You just have to give them a chance.
2. You find it impossible to envision a relationship that you could be happy in.
It’s as if you’re constantly expecting something to go wrong. You are always looking for things to be disappointed about. It’s like you’re totally convinced that happiness is a genuinely unattainable impossibility because of the many bad things that have taken place in your life.
3. You always act suspicious of the people you meet.
You always think that the people you meet aren’t being genuine. You are constantly trying to read between the lines. You are always trying to see right through people; to be able to figure out their ulterior motives. You have difficulty wrapping your head around the idea that people can be just who they really are.
3. You naturally doubt anything anyone is ever going to tell you.
It’s like your brain is just naturally predisposed to take everything that anyone says to you as a lie. You think that people these days are just virtually incapable of being honest about anything anymore. And so you just treat everyone as dishonest individuals.
4. You think that everything that could possibly go wrong is going to go wrong.
You always assume the worst is going to happen. You are so negative. You are such a pessimist. You can be a struggle to be around because of your exaggerated cynicism.
5. You get jealous even over the slightest things.
You are so insecure about your place in the relationships that you’re in that you get so jealous a little too easily. Even something as simple as letting your partner have friends who you don’t know can make you very uncomfortable.
6. You’ve decided that you are never going to allow yourself to fully trust anyone.
It’s like a conscious choice that you’ve made to just live with this phobia for the rest of your life. If you refuse to budge on this policy that you are imposing on yourself, then you are probably never going to be able to find love at all.
7. You crave for constant reassurance about your place in the relationship.
You always need your partner to be reminding you of how much they love you. You are always asking them to tell you that they aren’t going to hurt you – because you always find a way to freak yourself out with your own suspicions.
8. You demand too much a little too quickly in relationships.
If you’re just starting to date someone, you can’t expect this guy to just automatically pledge his love for you. You can’t expect him to be making solemn vows so early in your relationship. Yes, you want to lock him down so that you know that he’ll never hurt or abandon you. But you have to let things take their natural course as well.