Do you rely too much on your relationship for your happiness?
To a lot of people, falling in love and being in a relationship can actually be the pinnacle of human experience. And there’s really no denying just how amazing it is to be in a relationship with that one special person with whom you can imagine spending your entire life. A relationship has the power to bring you unlimited joy and happiness. However, that doesn’t mean that you should be relying on your relationship to be the sole source of happiness in your life. You have to remember that even though you’re in a loving relationship, you still need to be making sure that you are building an individual life of your own that you can be proud of. You can’t be making your relationship alone the sum of what makes up your entire life. You have to have other things going for you or else you risk putting to much pressure on your relationship and that could prove to be toxic for your romance.
So yes, while it’s okay to be in a relationship that makes you happy. It can’t be the only thing in the world that you are actually happy about. And how do you know if you’re guilty of relying too much on your relationship for happiness? Well, here are a few signs that you should be on the lookout for.
You are allowed to have a social life that doesn’t revolve around your partner. You don’t always have to be going to parties together. You don’t always have to be with your partner if they’re going for drinks out with their friends. They don’t always have to tag along with you to work functions. You should both be able to function as separate social individuals every so often.
2. You can’t seem to find anything fun to do without your partner.
You should still always be able to have fun without your partner. That’s what hobbies and passions are for. You have to be able to have your own things that you can fall back on whenever your partner is not around.
3. You get frustrated whenever you and your partner don’t get to talk for a while.
There are other people in this world. You have other friends. You don’t always have to be talking to your partner if you want someone to talk to. Look for another face to throw your words at.
4. You can’t seem to come to a decision on anything without consulting your partner.
It’s understandable that you would want to involve your partner in the decision-making process for the important stuff in life; especially the issues that directly concern your relationship. But when it’s the little things like trying to pick out what to wear or where to eat, you should be capable of forming independent thoughts about these things.
5. You tend to take on whatever mood your partner has at any given moment.
If your mood is overly dependent on your partner’s then you know that you rely too much on them. It’s weird. It’s as if you don’t allow yourself to be happy unless your partner is happy. You feel guilty about being sad over something if your partner isn’t sad about it. You are allowed to feel things on your own. You are allowed to have emotions that are independent of your partner’s.
6. You baby your partner almost to the point of suffocation.
You are both mature adults and you can both take care of yourselves ideally speaking of course. It’s okay that you want to care for your partner. It’s okay that you want to express your love for them by way of your affection. But you shouldn’t be babying your partner. They might see that as condescending. They know how to take care of themselves.
7. You can’t imagine how you would function if your partner wasn’t around.
This is a level of over-dependence on another person that is just downright unhealthy. You should still be confident about being able to function on your own even if your partner isn’t there.
8. You have difficulty coming up with the right words to define who your individual self is.
If you feel like you can’t define who you are without bringing up your relationship, then you know that you rely too much on your relationship to make you happy. You have to understand that your sense of self-worth and identity doesn’t have to be tied to whether you are in a relationship or not. You should always be making it a point to be building a great individual life for yourself that you could be proud to call your own.
9. You willingly take the blame for everything even when it’s not your fault.
You are so afraid of losing your relationship that you would practically own up to every single thing that goes wrong even when it’s not your fault. This is not healthy because it shows that you don’t have a sense of self-respect.
Talk to me
Is this true for you? Talk to me in the comments below!
