Is your long-term love in trouble?
It doesn’t even matter how long the two of you have been together, nothing is ever set in stone especially when it comes to love. A lot of couples who have been together for the longest time will fall into the trap of thinking that their relationships are practically indestructible. Just because there is a lack of any real and major issues in your long-term relationship doesn’t automatically mean that the both of you are out of the woods just yet. Yes, it’s good that you’ve been together for the longest time, but don’t think that that assures you a spot at the finish line. Keep in mind that love is a constant process of self-development and growth. You can’t afford to be complacent. You can’t afford to act nonchalant about it no matter how easy things may seem.
You have to constantly be reflecting on the state of your relationship because what not a lot of couples notice is that the deadliest triggers for destruction in the relationship are the ones that are subtle and silent. You won’t always be able to spot the red flags that a relationship is in peril if you don’t actively try to look for them. You always have to make it a point to assess and reflect on your relationship from a clear perspective. Don’t let your biases cloud your judgment. Don’t let your feelings of comfort blind you from the truth. It may feel like your car is running fine but you never know what problems may be going on in your relationship’s engine unless you actually pop the hood to take a peek.
But how do you know what to look for? What are the signs that your relationship is in deep trouble? Well, that’s what this article is for. You just have to make sure that you keep an eye out for these red flags so that you can spot them early. When you realize that these red flags are present in your relationship, you are going to have to make a few adjustments to try and save things.
1. You haven’t had a productive argument in a very long time.
Arguments are important in a relationship. A strong relationship doesn’t necessarily mean that a couple never fights. A strong relationship is one that is able to effectively manage conflict and disagreements in a way that makes their emotional bonds stronger. If you don’t argue, you might effectively be sweeping issues under the rug which may come back to bite you in the future.
2. Your conversations never seem to go beyond surface level.
The strongest couples are the ones who aren’t afraid of having the most serious and difficult conversations. They understand that being able to really bare one’s sole to their partner is essential in making a relationship work.
3. You don’t automatically turn to one another when you need help.
If you’re in a real long-term relationship, you have to be able to really trust and rely on one another. You have to serve as each other’s partners in life. You have to have each other’s backs. And if you just can’t find yourself to trust your partner, you know that that is a symptom of an even bigger underlying issue.
4. You find that you would rather spend time with other people than your partner.
Time is precious and it’s really mostly spent with the things and people who mean the most to you. So if you find yourself wanting to spend more time with people who aren’t your partner, then it goes to show just where your priorities really lie in this life.
5. You stop celebrating each other’s important life milestones.
As a couple, you should be each other’s number one fans. If you are failing to support and cheer each other on in life, then that may mean that you’re no longer really emotionally invested in one another.
6. You feel your attraction for your partner diminishing more and more.
Attraction isn’t always going to be stagnant. It’s a roller-coaster. And so you shouldn’t be alarmed with the fact that it’s volatile. You should only be really alarmed when your attraction seems to be on a steady decline.
7. You keep on recycling your fights.
If you’re constantly recycling your fights as a couple, it could be a sign that you have a sheer inability to come to a resolution on any disagreements that you may have. You have to make sure that you are able to make compromises you have to meet each other halfway.
8. You or your partner have re-initiated communications with an ex.
It’s never a good thing when the ex starts stepping back into the picture. That’s not a scenario that anyone in a relationship could ever be comfortable with regardless of how long you’ve been together.
9. You spend the entirety of your time with one another.
While this may seem like a good thing, it isn’t. A couple, even a long-term one, always needs to be able to set boundaries and limits for one another. It’s unhealthy to let the relationships rule their entire lives.
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