You deserve this love!
Never believe in the phrase You always get what you give, in love. That’s rarely ever the case. There have been many instances of people giving so much more than they get in the relationship. These are the relationships that are downright abusive and toxic. These are the relationships that you really need to avoid at all costs. These are the relationships that ruin peoples’ lives and their entire outlook on love. So it’s very important that you never allow yourself to get into a relationship where you are giving more than you’re getting. That’s never what real love looks like. A strong relationship always has an equal exchange of love and affection.
Remember that you are the one who gets to decide just how much you can demand from a relationship. You get to decide if a relationship is going to be worth it or not. You get to decide whether a person is going to be deserving of your love or not. It can be comforting to believe that you are deserving of a person’s love just because you give so much to that person as well. But again, you have to be real. That’s not always going to be a guarantee. Just because you give all of yourself to another person doesn’t necessarily mean that that person is going to reciprocate the heartfelt gesture. There are terribly selfish people who will not be willing to go that kind of distance with you; these are people who will not want to meet you halfway. And that’s a sad truth.
But at the end of the day, it’s still you who gets to decide what kind of love you’re willing to receive from another person. You are still the one who makes the choice either to stay or to go and find someone better for you. You have the power in this situation. And so to help you become more aware of your power, here are a few things that you need to keep in mind to get the kind of love that you really deserve.
1. If you give all of yourself, you will be left with nothing.
Leave a little bit for yourself. There is some room for selfishness in a relationship. You don’t have to be the one who is always going all in and giving all of yourself. Your partner has to be able to meet you halfway.
2. Your boundaries dictate how you expect others to treat you.
Be clear and upfront about your boundaries in a relationship. Don’t tolerate any bullish behavior from any partner you might have. Always make sure that you are treated the way that you want to be treated.
3. Others will love you as much as you’re willing to love yourself.
Show some love for yourself and others will follow. If you continue to be too hard on yourself, others will think that it’s okay to be hard on you as well.
4. There are some people you just can’t change.
If your partner is an inherently despicable person, you have to understand that sometimes, not even all of the love in the world will be enough to force that person to become a better class of human being.
5. 2nd chances are fine but 3rd chances should be where you draw the line.
You have to have room for a few screw-ups. There is a learning curve there that you have to respect especially within new relationships. But when the acts of disrespect and disappointment become a consistent thing, you really have to draw the line.
6. Everyone is deserving of happiness, and one person’s happiness is never as important as another’s.
Just because you’re happy doesn’t mean your partner has to be unhappy. And vice-versa. It’s perfectly plausible for the both of you to have happiness at the same time. Neither one of you should have a monopoly on happiness in the relationship.
7. Kind acts are only as good as the intentions that are behind them.
Sure, your partner could be doing all the nice things in the world for you, but that isn’t enough. They have to mean it. If they only do nice things for you just to get you to do something nice for them, then their intentions aren’t pure.
8. Be more aggressive instead of being a passive victim.
If your partner isn’t treating you right, then do something about it. Stop ranting and nagging about your partner’s deficiencies in romance to your friends. Take a more aggressive approach and tackle the issue head-on. This is an issue that passive behavior cannot fix.
9. You can only be as happy as much as you let yourself be.
Allow yourself to smile. Remember, at the end of the day, you get to decide whether you are happy or not. You get to pursue your own happiness. You are still the master of your own fate. You get to call the shots in your life, and no one else.
Talk to me
Is this the love you got? Talk to me in the comments below!
