I feel you pain, honey…
First of all, you have to know that it’s very admirable that you try so hard to care for the people around you. It’s amazing that you’re always so willing to give so much of yourself to your relationships. It’s heart-wrenching to know that you’re so selfless to the point where your own well-being is sometimes compromised. There are very few people like you; someone who is brave enough to jump head first into the waters of love without having to think twice about it. You are always so quick to see the goodness in the people around you. You are the one who usually takes notice of the things that no one else really pays attention to.
You are always willing to give your helpful heart to the outcasts; the people who are so incredibly flawed that no one wants anything to have to do with them. These are the damaged human beings who roam the world; they are the ones that you take it upon yourself to help. They are the ones you convince yourself you can fix. But unfortunately for you, your kindness is often what allows others to take advantage of you. It’s the ones who you try to help who are also so willing to bite your hand when you feed them. It’s the ones who you give your whole heart to who are so willing to just stomp on it with their feet. They are going to milk as much as they can out of you until you have nothing left to give; and they’re going to leave you feeling helpless, dejected, and disappointed.
I wish so much to tell you that if you continue to be the kind and genuine soul that you are, the love that you deserve is going to come to you in no time. But that’s not going to be the truth. There are just too many terrible people in the world. And you, with your selfless heart, you aren’t going to discriminate any of them. And you are going to fall victim to a lot of them before you actually find the people you’re meant to be with. You’re going to end up stuck in a lot of terrible relationships with guys who are going to constantly play with your mind and mess with your sensibilities. They are going to victimize you with every chance that they get. They will abuse and manipulate you to do things that might be self-destructive to you, but beneficial to them.
These are the people who will keep you on the leash and string you along for the ride, but they will only throw you crumbs. They are never going to be the people that you need them to be. But they are always going to demand that you be your best self for them. And being the caring person that you are, you will consent to it. These are the temporary boys who walk in and out of your life depending on what’s convenient for them. You are going to meet a lot of men who will be so quick to feed you with sweet lines and words just to keep you hooked. They will shower you with flowery words but they really have no sincere intentions and motivations behind these words. They just want you to do their bidding and this is how they think they can achieve that.
This is how they think they can get as much out of you as they can. They will make you think that they’re so into you; but they’re really only ever interested in what you can offer them. They don’t love you. They just love what you can give to them. They’re never going to commit to you. These boys are never going to give you the safety and security that you might need from them in relationships. They are never going to be able to provide you with the ease of mind that you deserve from them. Instead, they will give you stress. They will trigger your insecurities. They will induce your anxieties. And they are going to feed off your vulnerabilities the best way that they can.
It’s difficult being the way that you are. You never seem to reap any rewards from it. But you have to persist. Because at the end of the day, you win. These men who let you go; they are the losers. And one day, when you do find the person who is going to make your patience pay off, you’re going to forget about every other guy who has wronged you. And you will gain a profound appreciation for the love that you have always deserved to have.
Just continue to love the way that you always have, and you’re going to eventually find the same kind of love for yourself.