A couple should always be transparent and open about their finances. Relationships are a two-way street; they require openness and dialogue to grow and become stronger.
Today’s story is about a couple – where the husband made his wife sign a prenup before marriage so he could secure his assets in case of a breakup or divorce. But the tables turned when he found out his wife earned three times more than him.
Reddit user Takingcrazypills000 posted her story on the AITA subreddit – where a wife asks the audience if she is wrong for laughing in her husband’s face when he found out she earned three times more than him.
Her post reads:
“So I F(32) have been married to my husband M(34) for 6 years. Before we got married he had me sign a prenup stating that our financials would always be separate and the only thing we would share was an expense account to pay for household-related fees. The reason for this was because he was making pretty good money and I was in graduate school so my financial situation was pretty bad but I signed nonetheless because I understood he wanted to protect himself. Anyway fast forward to now, I’ve been out of school for about 4 years and I make more than 3 times as much as he does. (I never asked how much he makes and he’s never asked me either).
“Anyway 2 weeks ago I told him that I was thinking about buying a new car as one I had, was really old since I had had it since my undergraduate days. He wasn’t really interested and just told me to get whatever I liked. So a week ago I decided to make the plunge and get an Audi, I was pretty excited as I had always wanted one….(at the time my husband was on a business trip, he got back yesterday) and I showed him my car…he was really happy for me, however later he asked me what my monthly payments were as the Audi was pretty new…at this point I told him that I had made the purchase in cash and that I had no monthly payments. He was taken back and asked with what money and I answered that I made more than enough money to be able to afford it. He didn’t talk after that and I thought that was that………however after a few hours he came back to me and told that he thinks we should void the prenup……This is where I might be the asshole I laughed in his face and asked him why I would agree to that and his answer was that we’re married and should share our financials. So I told him that we’ve been married for 6 years and yet we’ve never shared financials and I was fine with what we were doing, and his sudden change of heart was very suspicious. He called me a bunch of names and stormed out and didn’t come home and and I guess he told his family about our fight and they called to berate me and say how he supported me while I was in school (he didn’t) and now am wondering if I was the a**hole??”
After reading some of the responses, she went on to add a few edits on her post to elaborate on the situation further:
“Edit: I knew his salary when we got together, however he’s since gotten promoted and at first when I used to ask he would make comments that it was rude of me to ask how much he made so I stopped…he’s never really been interested in my career or job and we don’t bring our work home…. The reason I make 3x what he makes (I made the assumption from what I knew his salary had been) is because I work as a CRNA and he works as a software engineer.”
“Edit 2: I didn’t expect so many comments, thanks everyone for sharing your opinions….This post has really made me question everything in my life, I think am going to take a leave of absence from my work to sort out my life…..My husband was only my second relationship and I guess I was too caught up in school, work and debt to really see that my marriage was a sham….am not blameless which is hard to swallow, so I am going to have conversation with my husband and see where we go from here if anywhere.”
“Last Edit: Since it’s been a point of contention am gonna clear up a few things….I make 175 an hour and work between 40 to 48 hours a week…..from what I know he made about 90k when we got together am sure it higher now(he also works less hours)…we live in a state that is not expensive so my monthly contribution is about 1000-1200 a month….he had some property in NE so he wanted to protect that and I had debt from school (he did too but mine was bigger).”
After her post finished, she received unanimous support from the Reddit community – everyone said she did nothing wrong when she laughed. For context, NTA means “not the a**hole.”
Reddit user Here_for_tea_ said:
“He was happy to treat you like a gold digger until he wanted to become one himself.”
Another user, yonk182, said:
“I say NTA because she hasn’t made the mistake of bringing kids into this mess. What a relationship.”
Among some of the most-liked responses is Icy_Mistake__‘s, who said:
“So he wanted the prenup initially to protect his money because you didn’t have much, and now you have more money he wants to void the prenup so he can have more of your money?
No wonder you laughed in his face.
In this story, we think the husband should’ve had more faith in his wife and paid more attention to emotions over money and finances. More power to you, woman!
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