I Am Happier Being On My Own Than Being In A One-Sided Relationship

I no longer have you in my life. I no longer have the privilege of being to kiss or hug you. I no longer get to see you whenever I want to. I know that I’m probably never going to get you back ever again. And yet, I’m happy.

I have so much joy in my life. I somehow find a lot of peace and calm in knowing that I have no expectations for you anymore. I am now safe in the fact that I know that you are never going to disappoint me ever again because I’m never going to give you the opportunity to do so.

I know that that is essentially what ended up driving the two of us apart when it was all said and done. I always wanted so many things from you. I expected too much of you. I thought that you would actually be willing to love me the way that I deserved to be loved. I thought that you would eventually learn to take care of me the way that I took care of you.

But you never did. And I’m not going to make that same mistake ever again. I’m no longer going to believe in you because I no longer want to have anything to do with you. And it’s because of our separation that I’ve finally found my happiness. I should have known earlier that the key to happiness was to cease setting myself up for disappointment with you.

You always conducted yourself with so much selfishness and conceitedness in our relationship. You were practically only ever really concerned about your own needs and desires. And I was too blinded by my love to see just how toxic you were.

I was too dumb to realize that you were the source of all the despair, emptiness, and anxiety that I was experiencing during those times. It took me so long to realize that you never really did anything to help ease my woes. You never really made an effort to meet my expectations. You never really tried to do anything to bring any sense of happiness, joy, or contentment into my life.

It was really difficult for me to come to the realization that you just didn’t care about me. And a lot of that has to do with the fact that I just refused to believe it. The signs were already laid out for me and I still refused to acknowledge any of them. There were so many red flags but I never really paid them any mind.

I loved you so much to the point that I convinced myself that it was a good idea for you and me to stay together. I loved you too much to the point that I refused to believe that you were the source of all my pains. But now, I see the truth. Now, I realize that I should have gotten out of the relationship earlier.

But hindsight is 20/20 as they say. And it’s only now that I’m happy. I feel a lot better about myself because I’m no longer with you. I am a lot happier because I know that you’re never going to be around to torment me ever again.

I am so happy because I don’t ever have to worry about anyone taking advantage of me anymore. I no longer have to worry about anyone using me or manipulating me just for their own personal gain regardless of how I was left to feel.

I am so happy because I now do anything that I want. I can now freely pursue the things that make me happy. I can now do whatever I want without fear of anyone making me feel bad or guilty about it.

I try my best to keep you out of my mind because I’m afraid that your toxicity would still have the power to infest my thoughts. But in those moments when I feel fear, I remind myself that you’re no longer in my life and there is no way that you can hurt me ever again. Our one-sided relationship is done and over with.

You are no longer here to hurt me in the same way that you used to. You don’t have power over me. I am free from your grasp. I don’t have to worry about you anymore.

I am a lot happier now as a single person than I ever was when I was with you. I now know that what we had wasn’t true love. It was a toxic one. And unfortunately, I suffered the most for it. But I’m glad to be over that phase of my life now. I have learned a new kind of love: self-love. And it’s the best that I’ve ever had.

  1. I am not quite at the point where i can can say i am happier and better without out him but i also know after being givin false hope and broken promises the only thing i can do is accept it will never be what “we” planned so i have no choice but to accept it and take the time to heal and then be again and give myself my dreams

  2. This whole ‘ healing ‘ process takes a very LONG time considering the serious damage was 18 years worth. Today, I try not to blame myself but I’m riddled with guilt at what my children and I endured and it’s after effects. 😕

  3. The capacity for pain I endured started when I thought I wasn’t good enough to receive the good times. The measure of strength mentally and emotionally still doesn’t seem real enough to have endured the abuse my children and I suffered during the hard times. Learning I was always more than enough is an everyday lesson I still struggle with from time to time.

  4. My heart hurts so much all the time. It’s not a man I was dating, married to or like that. It’s my son. He is making all sorts of weird, untrue, unrealistic, literally ridiculous statements and accusing me of all sorts of lies. He won’t talk about it, will not say why but claims it’s all my fault. He’s killing me by inches and I don’t know how to make it stop. Therapy ain’t working!

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