Marriage is likely to be the last major step that all couples take in their relationships – and that’s why it’s such a big deal. When we first meet people who we develop romantic interests with, we try to really build on that interest. We establish a connection with that person and we nurture it to the best of our abilities.
You can meet someone you like, you can get to know him, and if things go well, you eventually build your relationship up enough to the point where you think about spending the rest of your lives together. And that’s really the ultimate goal for a lot of couples, right?
A vast majority of us will go into the dating scene with the hopes that we meet that one person we can spend the rest of our lives with. Sometimes, some of us are lucky enough to actually get it right on the first try. But then there are some of us who aren’t so lucky.
You might be one of those people who are going to have to endure a fair share of heartbreaks before you can really settle down with the person that you’re meant to be with. It can be a very difficult process to go through – falling in love with someone that you’re going to end up breaking up with anyway. But that’s a risk you’re just going to have to run if you choose to fall in love with someone.
That’s why you really want to be able to take your time before you decide on marrying someone. You don’t want to find yourself in a marriage with someone who makes you unhappy; someone who you’re just not compatible with after all.
Having to end a marriage is an infinitely more heartbreaking ordeal than ending a regular casual relationship. You put so much energy, time, and effort into making a marriage work; and you always want to make sure that it’s going to pull through. It’s absolutely essential that you are really able to get to know a person before you decide on marrying him.
Sure, there are some lucky couples who get married on a whim and they end up having their marriages last a lifetime. And there are also some couples who stay together for the longest time before they get married only to have their relationships end in divorce.
The point here isn’t just about the time that you spend with a person; it’s really about the strength of the connection that you form with one another. You can’t be put in positions where you are surprised by your partner’s behavior once you’re married. You need to be able to get a really good sense of one another even before you decide to tie the knot.
There are many reasons that could lead to the demise of a marriage. A lot of it may be due to incompatibility. But that’s something that you can fix when you spend enough time with a person. You can always grow to adjust or adapt to another person’s personality. And if not, that’s why it’s important for you to really test things out in your relationship before you get married; just so you know that your incompatibility issues won’t come back to bite you in your marriage. Another reason (and a fairly common one) that marriages end is emotional immaturity in at least one person in the relationship.
You need to always make sure that you are marrying a guy who is mature and ready for the challenges that come with marriage. Sure, the married life can look fun and simple on the outside. But it requires a lot of hard work and commitment. And there are just some people whose personality traits and dispositions prevent them from being viable partners in marriage. And if you notice that your man is guilty of a lot of the habits that are listed below, then he’s probably not cut out for marriage just yet. He has a lot of growing up to do.
1. He lies to you all of the time.
You can NEVER make a marriage work with a man who just refuses to be honest with you about everything. It’s best that you just break up with this pathological liar and be done with it.
2. He is very reckless with his money.
A lot of marriages can end because of shared financial problems. And be very careful about being in a relationship with a guy who doesn’t know how to manage his finances well.
3. He doesn’t act receptive to any criticism or feedback you give him.
All people in the world should always be open to criticism – that’s part of growth and development. If he refuses to listen to feedback, then he’s immature and he will never grow.
4. He physically or emotionally abuses you.
This should be self-explanatory. Why would you want to be in an abusive marriage?
5. He is dealing with some kind of addiction.
He has some serious issues that he needs to address before you can commit to him. You have to make sure that you are both stables on a psychological level if you are to make your marriage work.
