A lot of couples seem to think that relationships are hundred-meter sprints wherein they have to be giving all that they’ve got right away and all of the time. But that’s never really the case. Relationships aren’t sprints – they’re marathons. You can’t always expect to be living your relationship on the fast lane. You’re going to need to learn to slow things down a little bit. You’re going to have to learn how to adjust your pace every now and then. You should never be pressuring yourselves to be rushing through the many phases of your relationship. You have to take things as they come. You have to be patient enough to let things take their natural courses.
You don’t have to force your relationship to be a certain way just because you see that the relationships all around you are acting in a certain manner. It doesn’t work like that. As human beings, we are all unique and special in our own ways; so are our relationships. Just because another couple seems to be taking things quickly doesn’t mean that you have to be the same way. You need to let your relationship find its own rhythm and pace. You need to let your relationship move and grow on its own. You need to let your relationship breathe and recover at its own pace.
You have to remember that you can’t afford to be reckless in your approach to love and relationships. You can’t just be swinging wild haymakers at every challenge you may have to face as a couple. You need to be methodical. As tempting as it may be to let your emotions lead the way, you need to be able to stay analytical as well.
The true secret? The best and strongest kinds of couples are the ones who are able to drown out all the noise and block out all of the distractions. They are the couples who focus on themselves; they are the ones who focus on their own personal identities. These are the couples who don’t feel the pressure to be comparing their relationships to anyone else’s. They are the couples that understand that you don’t need to be going so fast all of the time just because everyone else seems to be speeding ahead of you.
They are the couples who know that the key to sustaining a love isn’t really about how you start it; it’s about how you keep things going. And in order to keep things going in a healthy manner, you’re going to have to learn to slow down. It’s only when you take things at a gradual and comfortable pace wherein you can really savor the nuances of love; wherein you can truly appreciate the beauty of being in love with someone who loves you in return.
It’s only when you see the value of taking things slow wherein you really learn to pay attention to the little things; wherein you gain a better appreciation for even the simplest aspects of a relationship.
Keep in mind that the moment that you fall in love with someone, it can be almost an instantaneous kind of feeling. It’s something that you are helpless to. It’s something that might happen beyond your control. You’re falling and you are thrust into a whole new world that you’re not familiar with. And that radical change can catch you off guard. You might be taken aback. You might not know what to do and you might find yourself in a state of disorientation.
But falling in love can also be the other way. It can also be a very slow and methodical process. Perhaps you slowly learn to fall in love with a person the more that you spend time with them. Perhaps you become more and more attached to a person with each passing day that you spend together. This is the kind of love that starts off with a very slow and organic pace that develops over time. Now which of these loves are better? Which of these loves are more valid? The answer is irrelevant because the question in itself is invalid. It doesn’t matter how you start a relationship. It’s how you keep things going.
It doesn’t matter if you had the most exciting start or the most boring one. None of it matters if you aren’t able to keep your love alive. And that’s where the bulk of the work is to be found. The question that you should be asking isn’t about how you should be starting your relationship; it should be about what you can be doing to make sure that you don’t end up losing your love. Because at the end of the day, falling in love can be the most beautiful thing in the world. But losing a love that is within your reach can also be the most devastating thing you could ever experience.
