Leave Him If He Makes You Feel Like You’re A Problem

It shouldn’t be a problem that he has to meet your needs in the relationship the same way that you try your best to meet his needs as well.

You’re not the problem in this equation. He is. It shouldn’t be a problem that you love someone with all of your heart. It only becomes a problem when the recipient of that love doesn’t exactly know what to do with it or reciprocate it. If he treats you like you’re a problem just because you’re his girl, then he’s not really a guy who is worth being with. He isn’t a guy who is deserving of your love or attention. He isn’t a guy you should be wasting your time with. If he makes you feel like you’re a problem, then you have to get up and leave him.

It shouldn’t be a problem that you have feelings and emotions. He doesn’t get to invalidate how you feel just because they inconvenience him in some fashion. He shouldn’t get to dictate how you handle your feelings especially when you do nothing to hurt him. Your feelings are your own and you have to have the freedom to deal with them however you see fit. And if you want to make yourself heard with regards to how you feel, he shouldn’t be treating that like some kind of problem.

It shouldn’t be a problem that you want to express your opinions and that somehow your opinions don’t necessarily align with his own. Your opinions matter. And he shouldn’t be disregarding them or shooting them down just because they don’t match his opinions. He shouldn’t consider it a problem that you want to engage with him about what you’re thinking. It shouldn’t be a problem that you can form your own independent thoughts and convictions. It’s only a problem that his ego and his mind can’t handle your own personal prowess.

It shouldn’t be a problem that you have your expectations for this relationship. Sure, it’s possible that you might have unreasonable expectations, but you could always work those out. However, it’s totally unacceptable if you have a mate who just doesn’t want to deal with your expectations in totality. He should always be understanding of your needs as a human being to have certain expectations especially when it comes to relationships. He shouldn’t have to treat your expectations like they are a huge burden on his shoulders; like some sort of huge inconvenience.

It shouldn’t be a problem that he has to meet your needs in the relationship the same way that you try your best to meet his needs as well. That’s what relationships are all about. It’s always going to be a give and take. And if he wants his own needs to be met, then he has to put in the work and meet your own needs too. And it shouldn’t be a problem that you both work to meet each other’s needs. It should be something that the both of you look forward to doing. He should consider it a pleasure to be able to meet your needs in a relationship’ it shouldn’t be a problem.

It shouldn’t be a problem that you act slightly territorial or possessive of him at times. Just as long as you don’t go overboard, he shouldn’t see it as something to worry about. In fact, he should see it as a pleasure. You love him so much and you’re afraid to lose him. You are protective of him because you wouldn’t want to have to imagine a life without him. And if he doesn’t understand that, then maybe he’s the problem in this scenario, isn’t he?

It shouldn’t be a problem that you want him to do things for you sometimes. What you have is more than just a relationship. It’s an actual partnership and that’s what it has to feel like if you really want it to work out. You have to be able to try your best to have each other’s backs. You always have to push yourselves to become better people; and to pick each other up when you don’t actually feel like you’re at your best. And sometimes, that means picking up the slack for one another on occasion. That shouldn’t be seen as a problem at all.

It shouldn’t be a problem that you have your occasional fears and apprehensions. It shouldn’t be a problem that you still have your insecurities. You are only human after all and you know that you are imperfect. You know that everything could change dramatically in a matter of seconds. You know that your fears shouldn’t be disregarder and your partner has to take them seriously. Your partner has to take you seriously. He has to do his best to ease you out of a place of fear and back into a place of safety. That’s his duty and it shouldn’t be a problem.

Your existence in his life shouldn’t be a problem. He should consider it a blessing. And if he just can’t see that, then he’s really not worth being with.

1 comment
  1. I really needed this. I was being treated as if my feelings (of not feeling like a priority to him) inconvenienced him. He never showed any care or concern for the fact that I was feeling this way. He told me that my feelings were “illogical,” accused me of wanting attention 24/7 (which I never even once implied), and also accused me of being jealous of his family and friends (simply untrue). I did my best to defend myself and tell him that these things are not true, but it was like talking to a wall at that point. He just would not let go of these things. I eventually became so overwhelmed that I suggested that I treat him the way that he treats me. I was then told that this is “childish.” It was a helpless situation for me. No matter what I said, I was apparently wrong for it.

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