Some people may believe that marriage and other relationships are all about having romantic moments and fun. Many people nowadays believe that they are so madly in love that they can take whatever their partner has to offer, doesn’t matter if it is good or bad. It is true that love is blind and can make you ignore the realities as well but that does not mean that you will not reach your breaking point and forgive your partner and yourself for all the mistakes you make. After all, we are all human, we have our flaws, and sometimes we fail to see those flaws either for good or bad.
In some cases, this may lead to unrealistic expectations. That eventually makes it hard for the person to face realities and sometimes one may try to escape all the pain by choosing separation. That is never the solution. Marriage and commitment is not a joke and those who find the easy way out should always try to give it another shot because escaping is the act of weak people.
There are several ways which can help you save your relationship and stop you from having false hopes and fantasies regarding real life.
If you keep those tips in mind, you will realise that things can go good without any serious problems in your love life. Initially, it may seem like too much to go with, but once you start practicing all this, it gets better and easier.
1. Don’t fantasise too much:
Many couples make fantasies about how their future life will be, especially when they don’t realise that there are certain realities of life which aren’t very pretty. The day you get into a serious relationship and take steps towards actually spending the rest of your lives together, you realise that there are things about your partner that aren’t so beautiful and so fun.
When the reality hits hard and you cannot handle it, then one may start to find excuses to escape. The best way to prevent yourself from doing that is don’t fantasise too much in the beginning.
2. Forgive and forget:
This may be hard for some people to do but forgetting and forgiving has been one of the oldest ways to avoid problems and quarrels. Some people may have an ego problem and some people may not be the ones who forget things easily, but in order to save your relationship with the person you love or have made vows with, you will have to compromise and forgive them for their mistakes and forget it.
3. Stay Lovers as well as friends:
The best kind of relationships are the ones where the partners are more like friends. It makes the things more fun and easy. The ego problem goes away in such cases and the couples communicate a lot and understand each other better. Here, the most important factor is being able to communicate openly.
4. Try to adapt to things quickly:
There will be a lot of changes once a couple moves in together. Several facts will start to get prominent, factors that they probably didn’t know about earlier. Suppose when you sleep together, you find out that your partner snores loud when he/she is tired. Instead of getting annoyed, either find a solution or try to adapt to things. The example of snoring is just to give you an idea, there are things which are a little hard to adapt to so if you try to adapt to things quickly, everything will get easier.
5. Teamwork helps:
Relationships are all about teamwork. When you plan to spend your life with someone, you have to do things together. Similarly, when you are married or are in a serious relationship, you have to go through everything together. This way, the burden get less and you get closer to each other. The value of one another increases and you stay motivated in keeping things together. Also, in hard times when you remember all those moments spent together, it gets easier to stick together and forget whatever bad thing that has happened.
6. Travel a lot together:
Travelling is fun and when you get to travel with your loved one, it becomes even better. Travelling gives you a break from the tough and hectic routines that you have back home, and it gives you the chance to see each other from a different perspective. This way, the chances of you getting closer will get high and the lost attraction will bloom once again.
7. Develop a few individual interests:
Sometimes, your partner may be busy and this can lead to you feeling lonely. The best solution to this is to find interests of your own, so that you keep yourself busy when your partner isn’t around. ThisВ may help take the edge off.
8. Try to have many mutual friends:
It has been observed that couples who have many mutual friends have lesser chances of separation because friends know all the sides of their story and point out the mistakes that both of them are making. Which eventually makes it easier for the couple to come to a conclusion that they have to stick together and fix those problems instead of making it worse. Another thing observed in such cases is that to avoid post-separation awkwardness among mutual friends, couples decide to just go with their relationship and during that time they find the positivity again.
9. Don’t compete too much with each other:
Some couples have a bad habit of competing about things like who did more chores and who earned more this month or who takes care of the kids more. In such cases, the chances of clashes are even more. It’s better to either keep a balance or just do the chores irrespective of how much time it will take. Blaming and competing will only make things worse.
10. Take care of your health and workout to stay in shape:
Good health and physical attractions keep relationships strong and healthy. If you take care of your health and looks, your partner will stay attracted to you and will not have to worry about your physical wellbeing. Many relationships get disturbed when the partner doesn’t take care of his or her health.
11. It is okay to admit sometimes that you are wrong:
Sometimes to avoid a fight, it is okay to say sorry. During a fight, your ego forces you to keep on going with the fighting instead of simply saying that you were wrong. This hurts your partner and it may create a distance. Killing your ego there and then helps you in keeping your relationship safe.
12. Big or small, celebrate all accomplishments:
What is the fun in accomplishing something when you don’t get to celebrate it? Celebration is like cherishing everything that you have achieved and it will make your partner feel happy. It will keep you both bonded. Celebrating happiness and smiling together is good for emotional health. Similarly, rewarding each other for hard work can give you a break from your hectic life.
13. Don’t stop communicating, no matter what:
Sometimes, couples stop talking to each other after being in a relationship for a long time. They act like robots, they complete their everyday responsibilities and that is it. Lack of communication can also lead to misunderstandings. The best example can be taken from the movie ‘Mr. and Mrs. Smith’, where they both were initially in love and then they stopped communicating and acted like robots in everyday life, doing their jobs and that is it.
14. Repeat the things your partner likes:
If your partner tells you that there is something about you that he or she likes a lot, then repeat that behaviour. It will make your partner happy. Similarly, you can tell your partner what you like about them.
15. Give surprises to each other:
Give each other surprises from time to time, it is fun and it will make the two of you realise that you care and want one another to be happy. A birthday party surprise or an anniversary surprise. A surprise doesn’t mean that there should be a lot of people, it can only be for you and your partner. Make arrangements and tell them how much they mean to you.
16. Encourage each other in at all times, good or bad it doesn’t matter:
Everyone gets to face hard times in their life, and people always value those who have been on their side during all those hard times. Similarly, keep supporting your partner in these times, irrespective of their condition and help them rise back up. Talk to them about it and tell them it will be okay. This way, your relationship will strengthen even more.
17. It is okay to have secrets but not too many:
Everyone needs their space. It is okay to keep a few secrets which you think can lead to a serious problem in your relationship, but too many secrets are never okay. Share things with each other and try to understand them even more.
18. Try to keep a balance between the distribution of chores:
Distribution of chores or completing the chores can help you both in getting close to each other. Doing chores isn’t a competition, in fact, it is your responsibility. If you can’t do them together then try to distribute them equally. So that one of you doesn’t get cranky by doing all of the chores.
19. Avoid using harsh words:
Words are really powerful and they can hurt people to an irreversible extent. People use a lot of angry and harsh words when they are upset, try not to use those words because they can hurt your partner and he or she may not be able to forget what you said. This can create differences and distances.
20. Talk like sensible people, don’t lash out:
If something wrong happens, instead of bombarding each other with angry gestures, try to talk like sensible human beings and be rational. This way, future errors can be avoided and it can be talked about. Talking rationally can avoid quarrels.
21. Compliment one other whenever you get the chance:
Whenever you get the chance, try to appreciate efforts and tell you partner when he or she looks good. This will show them that you pay attention and it will make them want to groom themselves up even more. Couples who complement each other are closer and happier.
22. Sometimes it is okay to keep quiet:
During an argument, sometimes it is okay to stay quiet and listen to what your partner is saying. Maybe there is something that they have wanted to tell you for a long time but couldn’t due to multiple reasons and during this time, while your partner is angry and talking about it, he or she may speak up and you will be able to understand him/her better.
23. Respect each other’s space:
Respecting each other’s space is very important because some people are all over their partners, such things are very unhealthy for their relationship. It is important that you give your partner the space they require. If there is something that’s bothering you a lot, talk to them about it, but being all over them and interfering in every aspect of their life can be harmful for the relationship.
24. Stay hygienic:
If you take care of your hygiene, you naturally become more attractive and desirable. So hygiene is very important. Of yourself as well as of your surroundings. Use perfumes and other hygiene products.
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Do you think these things can make a relationship last longer?
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