This is a story of a heartbroken and distraught husband-to-be – his fiance rejected the ring he bought for her. The ring had a lab-grown diamond and cost about $20,000.
It is a Reddit story posted on the AITA subreddit where users write about specific scenarios and ask the community whether they’re right or wrong.
The Story
A man on Reddit, username throwaway1578650, posted his question in the AITA subreddit – trying to see whether he did the right thing or not. His wrote:
“Throwaway account, for reasons. I (30m) proposed to my (then) girlfriend (27f) of 5 years last month, it was wonderful and she said yes, and we were never happier.
Last week was when the trouble started, as she asked me how much I had spent on her ring. I told her that I had spent about $20,000 on it that I had been squirrling away for the last 10 years. (When I first started saving I was planning on building a kit car but when I started seriously considering proposing I decided it was worth spending the money on the ring.) She was initially floored that I had spent so much but later became suspicious that I had managed to get such a large stone (3.6 karats.) for the price, and asked to see the diamond certificate I got with the ring. I, of course, showed it to her (I thought she was worried I had been duped into buying a fake.) and when she saw it was lab grown she got upset that I hadn’t bought her a “real” diamond. This reaction stunned me for a couple reasons. Firstly, I had always been open in my distaste for the natural diamond industry, and secondly because I had employed the assistance of her friends and mother and everyone agreed that she wouldn’t care if the diamond was lab grown.
Over the last week I have explaned to her multiple times my reasons for going lab grown, (It is better for the environment, I know the exact origing of the stone, so I know it isn’t a conflict stone, and ultimately it is better value for the money and I wanted to get her the most beautiful ring possible.) and that lab grown diamonds are in every way real diamonds and that they are also indistinguishable from natural ones unless you look at their certificate. I have also pointed out that she had no clue and would have never known if I hadn’t told her the price of her ring. But she insists that she can tell a difference and it is just not the same.
Yesterday she asked me if I would be willing to exchange it for a natural stone of equivalent value. Normally I would be happy to, but I spent months searching for the perfect ring for her and also, though value was the biggest reason for me, the idea of potentially getting a blood diamond really does sicken me. So I said no, and said if she wanted to give the ring back and end our relationship, that is fine, but I would not exchange it. She called me an asshole and went to stay the night with her parents. Since then I have received multiple texts from her friends telling me to just acquiesce and exchange the ring (and, ultimately, I will if it means saving the relationship) but I just feel like this is something worth being firm on.
TLDR: The engagement ring I bought for my fiance contains only lab grown diamonds and she wants to exchange it for one with natural diamonds but I would strongly prefer not to.”
The Responses
The community was quick to come to the man’s support – telling him he’s not wrong and his fiance doesn’t have her heart in the right place. For context – NTA means “Not the A**hole.”
CZT1991 wrote:
“This is a pretty good sign of how the actual wedding and marriage will go imo. NTA. You’re trying to look out for the world, if a “real” stone was that important to her, she probably would’ve brought up being against/wanting a lab created diamonds some point in your relationship. She’s being picky and should’ve been happy about the ring, which btw, sounds gorgeous (and I commend your effort for looking into options for so long)
Beautiful_mistakes chimed in:
“NTA You spent $20,000 on a ring and she isn’t happy? I think you have bigger fish to fry. What’s going to be enough for her?
uhtredsbabymama wrote:
“NTA – I can’t understand why you’d want to be with someone who is willing to actually end a relationship over a non-conflict diamond that was given to her out of love and a hope for a future together. Mind boggling to me how much of an A H she is being. I can only imagine what else she demands or will demand from you going forward.
The community stood by this man, telling him to keep his spirits up and be thankful for seeing his fiance’s true nature early on. You can read all of the comments on Reddit here.
Our Take
When a man is trying to be environmentally friendly by saying no to blood diamonds, he deserves a lot of praise and respect. In a shallow world where most people wouldn’t think twice about how their diamonds are obtained, this man is different in a good way! Good on you for standing your ground!
- Reddit – AITA For buying my fiance a lab grown diamond and refusing to exchange it for a natural stone?
What’s Your Take?
What are your thoughts on this man’s heartbreaking story? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!
She is just a hole that, move on my guy and engage a woman who is worthy your time and will appreciate you in everything you will be doing for her, i mean that fiance of five years, is not worthy being given that ring it probably belongs to someone else better than her…. Its only bitc#####chs who act like she did.