Recently a father divided social media users in their opinions by posting about his conflict with his wife – he said he didn’t want their five-month-old son to sleep between them on their bed while his wife wanted otherwise.
In a post shared on Reddit, user Quirky_Addendum_2779 wrote on the website’s Am I The A**hole (AITA) forum,
“I [M28] live with my wife Macey [F28],” he said.
“We have an infant son named Leo. Leo is our first and only child and is five months old. Macey works part-time, and I work full-time.”
“Macey works on Tuesdays, but I don’t. Macey normally leaves the house at around 8:00 am to get to work on time, but I like to take the opportunity to sleep in when I can get it.”
He further added that their son, Leo, will start crying in his crib after being properly fed whenever his wife gets ready for work.
“This doesn’t wake me up unless he’s been crying for a little while because I’m a heavy sleeper,” he wrote. “For the past two Tuesdays, Macey has decided to take Leo out of his crib and put him in our bed with me right before she leaves for work, even though I’m sound asleep.”
“She doesn’t do anything to wake me up because she’s leaving for work, and Leo stops crying when she puts him in our bed.
“Luckily nothing bad has happened yet but I know the risks of putting a baby in a normal bed with an adult sleeping in it. Leo crawls and I’m worried that he could fall out of the bed and hurt himself.”
The new dad said he tried to talk to his wife about this issue and asked her not to put the baby in bed while he was asleep.
“Macey got annoyed and said that she can’t ‘just leave him to cry’, and said I’m a bad father for not noticing and waking up when Leo is in bed, saying that if it was her, she’d notice and wake up. I got angry and told Macey that she was being unreasonable and asked her what she thought would happen if Leo fell out of bed. I asked her if she wanted Leo to get injured.”
He said that his wife got so mad at him that she left the house with Leo and went to stay with her sister.
“I tried to call her, but she has not been picking up my calls or answering my texts; I’ve never seen Macey this angry with me before, so I’m wondering if I was the AH for how I approached this.”
He also added, “I get off work at 4 – 5 am on weekdays, so I’m getting around 3 hours sleep when Macey goes to work. Macey only works one day a week, we don’t need her income, and I make more money, but she likes her job, and I respect her choice to work. I work 70 hours a week and do my fair share of housework and cooking when I’m home, so I sleep like the deceased when I’m in bed.”
His post sparked debate on the platform, where many users were divided in their opinions. However, the majority agreed that both parents were at fault in this situation.
In a comment that received nearly 15,000 upvotes, user serotoninwarrior wrote,
“I’m going to go ahead and say ESH [everyone sucks here]. The user explained that they ‘agree that his wife should be waking him up when placing the baby in the bed” and that ‘placing him there is not a good idea.’ However, ‘sleeping in should not come before your child. Especially if the other parent is going to work and can’t mind him.’”
Another Redditor agreed with the ESH approach and said no one is right in this scenario.
“She shouldn’t put him in the bed with a sleeping adult, BUT
That adult must wake up and care for the baby while his wife gets ready. He should already be doing this.”
“OP is more TA than the wife, who is probably just stressed and feeling guilty about letting the baby cry and making a poor decision because of it. OP, get your ass up and help.”
Meanwhile, some other Redditors agreed with the husband and said his wife should get some sense,
“Another point, if I may- I feel like the wife could at least wake him up and let him know when she’s gonna put the baby in bed. I’m not a parent, but I grew up with a few younger siblings, and I can say it’s not terribly hard to tune out crying if you’re super tired.”
“The wife should at least wake OP up when she is leaving for work, I mean, how could you leave a baby with a person who’s a heavy sleeper without waking him up?” another agreed.
Who do you think is at fault in this story? The husband or the wife? Let us know your views in the comment section.
Source: Reddit
