Money can often cause couples to argue because it plays a significant role in their lives and relationships.
In a 2022 survey of 2,000 UK couples, 62 percent confessed to having money-related disagreements with their partners. This issue recently came up for a man on Reddit, who posted about it in the famous ‘Am I The A**hole’ (AITA) thread.
On the online forum, a 39-year-old man, who chose to remain anonymous, shared his desire to take a vacation for his upcoming 40th birthday, something he had never done before.
“Hi all, I (39M) am dating someone (33F) and have been for the last 3 months,” the user wrote.” Things are going well until the topic of my 40th birthday came up.”
“Next year I turn 40. And I’ve never taken an actual vacation. I’ve extended work trips to do something fun where I am,” he explained. “I’ve traveled to visit friends or family. Always just for a long weekend (never more than 3 days total). I want to take a week and travel purely for recreational purposes. My criteria is that the trip needs to be at least a week and be international.”
The poster said his finances were ‘in good shape’ because he had been managing them well since his twenties. He saved up some money for the trip, but his girlfriend hadn’t done the same.
“I have a decent business and some money set aside and I feel like I’m ready for a trip and next year woukd be a great opportunity as it is a milestone birthday,” he added.
“My girlfriend is great. She works hard and supports herself. But she doesn’t make as much money and, most importantly, is currently saddled with around $20k in credit card debt arising from a period of unexpected unemployment she had in the past that forced her to burn through savings and live on credit cards.”
Considering the upcoming trip and his girlfriend’s financial situation, the man offered to cover their accommodation if she could manage her own airfare.
Given their three-month relationship, he was reluctant to fund her entire vacation and believed she should contribute financially to join him.
“When the topic of this trio came up, she first asked if she could go. I said sure. She then asked if we could go to Vegas. I told her about my desire for this to be an international trip. Then she expressed concern over if she could afford it while it debt,” he wrote on the online platform.
“I told her I’d be willing to cover our lodging and, depending on where we go, help her pay for airfare. Because we haven’t been dating long, I don’t feel comfortable paying her whole way and feel she should contribute financially to come along.”
The man continued, “She then told me she didn’t feel she could afford to cover meals + half airfare even if I went somewhere relatively cheap (I was thinking possibly the Caribbean, where trip flights are typically under $500). So I said that I understood, but I also have been wanting to do this milestone birthday thing for a while now, and I still intend to go, even if just by myself and would only be gone a week.”
The disagreement sparked a fight between the couple, and the man’s friends and family are divided on whether he’s at fault or not.
“I can see both sides and just want to know, AITA?” he concluded his post.
Most comments in the long discussion supported the original poster, and some called his girlfriend a ‘red flag.’
“NTA You’ve got too much of your own life to let yourself be held back by someone you’re barely invested in. She can either get over her fomo or you can find a new partner who is supportive,” one person commented.
“MATE, RUN. This woman gives 0 f’s about you and your life and your plans!” a second suggested.
“NTA. Red flag. You’ve been with her for only 3 MONTHS so far and she’s already sulking for you not footing the entire bill for a trip for YOUR milestone birthday NEXT YEAR?” a third remarked.
What are your views on this story? Let us know in the comments below.
Source: Reddit
