Intimacy doesn’t always have to mean sex. And sex doesn’t always have to mean intimacy. Yes, the two are related to one another. But one doesn’t necessarily have to define the other completely. Sex is a great way to build physical intimacy in a relationship – but it’s only one way. You have to remember that there are many layers to intimacy in a relationship. And it all doesn’t always have to revolve around humping each other’s brains out.
Having a healthy and active sex life with your partner is only one aspect of the equation. But that’s not all that you can do to build intimacy in a relationship. But before we get into that, it’s important to first establish what intimacy really is and why it’s vital for you and your partner to always be working at it together. Intimacy is essentially the level of closeness that two people can have together. And that closeness can manifest itself in different forms. There is emotional intimacy and there is physical intimacy as well.
So yes, in a sense, sex is the ultimate form of physical intimacy. But it’s not the only way that you can get closer to your partner. It’s only one layer. There are plenty of things that you and your partner can be doing to increase your intimacy – and these things don’t even have anything to do with sex.
So when you’re playing in the bedroom with your partner, you don’t have to think that you need to be having sex to be intimate with one another. Get creative. Be fresh. Keep things interesting. Add some variety and diversity to your intimate routines. Here are 10 nonsexual things that you could be doing in the bedroom to help increase your intimacy with one another:
1. Just talk.
Talking is the most effective way to build on your emotional and mental intimacy with another person. Just take the time to really talk about who you are as individuals and who you are as a couple. Really connect with one another. Bare your souls to each other. Be as vulnerable as possible when you’re talking. Really be your genuine selves and hold nothing back. Hide nothing from each other. When you’re in your bedroom together,
you can feel as safe and as protected as possible. You can express yourselves without feeling judged or criticized. And you can constantly talk about finding new ways to really connect with one another as a couple.
2. Spend some time cuddling with one another.
Cuddling doesn’t necessarily have to be a required pre or post-sex activity. In fact, cuddling doesn’t even necessarily need to have anything to do with sex at all. You could just be enjoying each other’s embrace; enjoy being in each other’s arms. Find comfort in the warmth and security of each other’s body. Feel safe being in the physical presence of one another.
3. Give each other a nice massage.
Neither of you might be professional therapists; but everyone always loves a good rub down – especially when it’s conducted by someone they love dearly.
4. Go to sleep together.
And when we say sleep together, actually go to SLEEP together. There’s just something very endearing about being able to drift away into dreamland beside the person that you love the most. And the best part of sleeping together is being able to wake up next to one another. You get to wake up to the one face that you always want at your side for the rest of your life.
5. Go to bed at the same time.
It’s almost symbolic how after a long and stressful day, you get to go home to the one person who makes everything alright. No matter how stressful your day might be, you always get to look forward to getting into bed with someone who you can always confide in; someone you can always draw strength and inspiration from. It’s a great routine that the both of you
6. Play wrestling with one another in bed.
Just be kids and act silly with one another in bed. Play around. Have fun. Have a few laughs. Just enjoy each other’s company and act crazy together.
7. Make your partner breakfast in bed.
It might be cliché; something that you always see in the movies. But there’s something always so intimate about two people sharing a meal together. It’s especially intimate whenever the meal is prepared and served with love.
8. Take all distractions out of the bedroom.
One of the most effective ways to get intimate with your partner is to shut out all of the distractions. Get rid of any televisions that you might have in your bedroom. When you’re in your room together, have a “no cellphone” use. Really take that opportunity to just focus on yourselves and shut out the outside world for a minute. Block it all out so you can focus all of your attention on each other.