It’s always great whenever you find a best friend in life. You have a person with whom you have really connected. You have a person with whom you can share lots of joy, fun, and laughter.
You have a person who is going to bring a lot of happiness into your life; someone who is always going to understand you even when no one else does.
But when you do decide to become best friends with someone, you are always going to have to showcase a little vulnerability. You are going to have to open yourself up to that person on a very intimate scale.
And even though there are a lot of benefits that come with being intimately close with a best friend, there are also a number of potential risks as well. Because of how close you are, you run the risk of actually crossing the line and developing feelings for your best friend.
You might actually want to become more than just friends with someone. And that’s always dangerous because you are then putting your entire best friendship at risk. You are rocking the boat and you might not actually have your desires met.
It’s a fine line that you’re walking and you want to make sure that you don’t fall into situations that might compromise whatever great thing you have with one another.
But since it’s such a fine line, how do you know if you’re actually in love with your best friend or if you just happen to love them because you’re besties?
What if you decide to take a risk and you end up ruining your best friend as a result? That is a legitimate concern that you seriously have to consider before you act. You don’t want to be acting too hastily in this situation.
You always want to stay calculated and methodical in your actions. And how do I know all of this? Well, I have had the same situation happen to me in the past.
I had a best friend and her name was Ariana. And we were both innocent enough in our friendship. We related on so many levels. We were both athletic people who were passionate about fitness and athletics.
We were always so fond of coffee and we shared a number of coffee dates just bonding and talking about life in general. We were always acting in sync. We thought the same way because we had very similar worldviews. Everything was going great in our friendship and I really couldn’t have asked for more from it.
But then, I started to realize that I was steadily becoming more and more attracted to her. And then I became conflicted. I didn’t know what to do. I was unsure of what my next steps should have been.
What if what I was feeling was completely false and I was just reading the situation wrong? I was absolutely terrified of the idea of losing her as a best friend. I didn’t want that at all.
Her companionship gave me so much happiness and joy in life and I definitely didn’t want to lose it. But still, I couldn’t shake the idea that somehow we could have had more. Maybe we could have been more. Maybe she was worth the risk. I was scared. I was confused. I didn’t know what to do.
I’ve learned that it’s very much okay for you to be questioning whatever feelings you might have for a best friend. Dr. Gary Brown, an expert psychotherapist, and relationship counselor, echoes this belief. He says that it’s always important that you look deep inside to how you are feeling so that you don’t make any rash decisions without first thinking about it.
You never want to be reckless in this kind of situation. You want to always be taking full command over your emotions. And you don’t want to have your feelings get the best of you.
If you are having trouble navigating the situation that you’re in, then maybe you can ask yourself a few guide questions to help you come to terms with how you really feel.
What type of romantic relationship would you have with this person?
Are you sure that this isn’t just a case of you wanting something that is forbidden?
Is the attraction that you have for your partner just physical or do emotions come into play as well?
Are you able to trust them in a romantic sense?
How is this going to potentially affect your relationship in the long run?
And most importantly, is this person going to make you happy?
Take some time in answering these questions. Hopefully, by the end of it all, you will get the answer that you have been looking for.