In this day and age, a lot of us are guilty of creating our own manic-depressive environments by constantly comparing our lives to other peoples’. And it’s a lot more prevalent now because of the significance of social media in our everyday lives. We are constantly exposing ourselves to the lives of the people we know on our news feeds. And sometimes, you won’t be able to help but just compare what you’re doing in your life to what they’re doing in theirs.
But that is dangerous. Because what you don’t realize is that people only typically show you what they want you to see. You don’t really get to see what goes on behind the scenes. You don’t know the whole story. And so it’s pointless to be comparing your situation to theirs.
However, you might still find it difficult to completely stop yourself from thinking about the sex lives of other people and how they compare to your own. And that’s precisely what this article is here for. This article is going to dish out some cold hard truth. And you just have to make sure that you read it with an open mind and an open heart. It’s all for your own good anyway. Here is what you need to be doing so you can stop comparing your sex life and the sex lives of those who are around you.
1. Just tell yourself to stop comparing.
Have some self-control. If your will is strong enough, you can stop yourself from comparing your sex life to other people. Just commit to whatever resolution you come to and it will happen.
2. Ask yourself if the comparisons you are making are really what you want.
Sure, you might notice that a lot of the people around you are really happy with their sex lives. They might be having a lot more sex than you in a week. They might be trying out all of these wild positions that you aren’t trying. They might be having sex in places that you have never had sex in. But think to yourself: do you really want those things for yourself? You might just be caught in a “grass is greener on the other side” situation. And so, your comparisons become moot at that point.
3. Accept that imperfection means that you’re doing it right.
It’s not always going to be perfect most especially when you’re just starting to get to know your partner on a sexual level. Sex – much like anything else in life – is always a learning process. You are constantly trying to better yourself. You are always learning something new with each and every experience. And know that people change. You can evolve.
You might develop a few new tastes and preferences along the way. Your partner might also change as well. That’s why it’s important for your sex lives to always be growing and adapting to your own needs. There is no specific standard that you need to be hitting every single time. It’s a constantly changing process. It’s dynamic. There is no “perfect” standard that you need to be living up to every time you do it. Take your imperfections and own up to them; learn from them the best that you can.
4. Understand that you can only control your own sex life – and own up to it.
You have to know that in the areas of sex, there is just no universal standard. Sure, there are some common practices that a lot of people typically like. But there are also some unique eccentricities that appeal to certain groups of people. There are specific fantasies, quirks, fetishes, and kinks that drive peoples’ sex lives – and it would be stupid to make any generalizations that should apply to everyone.
We are all unique human beings and we all have our own personal tastes, preferences, and likes especially in the area of sex. No one else is going to have your orgasm for you. You get to decide what you like and you get to decide how you get to climax.
So just own up to it. Own up to all of your experiences and everything that you’ve been exposed to. Own up to all of your likes and your dislikes. Work on your strengths and capitalize on them as much as you can. Know your limits and your weaknesses and just be outright with them with your partner. Maximize what you can do and all of the opportunities that you have.
At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that both you and your partner are happy and satisfied. Everything else is just noise. Just stop resisting. You know this to be the truth. Own up to it. Embrace it. You get to decide just how happy your sex life really is. And the sex lives of other people are just irrelevant. Focus on your story.