Liars. What’s their deal? What drives people to lie in the first place? Why is it that there are a lot of people who just feel no remorse when they deceive those who are around them? Why is there a lot of us who exist in this world who feel so comfortable with lying so guiltlessly? What is the motivation? What goes into a lie and why is it so easy for so many of us to do it on a consistent basis? Is lying even really wrong? Can lying ever be right? These are all very complicated questions and a definitive answer may never be found. However, that doesn’t mean we can’t have our share of educated theories on the matter.
Here’s the thing, habitual liars are going to be predictable in the way that they conduct themselves regardless of whether they have personality disorders or not. You just have to make sure that you know what to look for with how they conduct themselves so that you can protect yourself from the deceit. You don’t really want to be made a fool of. You don’t want to be played by a pathological liar under any circumstance. You always want to be in the know. You always want to be on the side of truth. You never want to be kept in the dark especially in the context of an intimate relationship. That is why you really need to make yourself aware of some of the predictable habits and tells of a habitual liar.
Ultimately, experts in the field have found that narcissists tend to do typically do either one or both of these two things: they will lie even more to try to get themselves out of trouble and/or they will try to portray themselves as the victim in the situation. And be very careful because the most skilled liars and narcissists are so good at masking their tactics. And you should also probably know that there are many possible ways in which they can portray themselves as a victim.
When they are caught in their own web of lies, a liar can sometimes resort to crying. This is their way of trying to gain sympathy and trust. This is their way of expressing fake remorse for all of the damage that they have caused with their lies. Even the more advanced and skilled deceivers will take things to the next level by exhibiting fake psychosomatic symptoms. They will tell you that they’re sick in the mind and that everything they do is just a symptom of their sickness. This is their way of trying to absolve themselves of any responsibility. However, before you fall victim to these pitiful and endearing advances, you really need to ask yourself: are they acting that way because they are genuinely remorseful and sad about causing pain towards you and other people? Or are they just regretting the fact that they got caught at all? It’s very important that you find out the real answer to these questions. You need to have a solid grasp of the situation before you decide to act on anything.
If you notice that the habitual liar is acting more like they are the victims in this scenario more than doing anything to remedy the situation that they have caused, then you have sufficient reason to doubt them. You can always trust a liar who tries to fix all of the problems that they have instigated in the lives of other people. However, if they are merely absolving themselves of any accountability; if they don’t do anything to try to calm the storm that they are causing, then you know that they aren’t being genuine about it. They aren’t sorry about having lied to you. They are only sorry that they got caught. And you should never feel sorry for a liar. Don’t fall victim to their manipulative tactics. Don’t be played for a fool. Don’t get caught in their web of lies as well. You can’t let your feelings lead you into making a mistake. Be rational. You shouldn’t be so willing to let liars make fun of you and play you like a fiddle.
But then, there is another tactic that they might employ which you really need to make sure you don’t fall victim to.
Sometimes, these serial liars are going to explode. They will start to feign bursts of outrage and anger in an effort to make everything more confusing. They will try to make it seem like it’s your own fault that they were caught in their lies. This is more commonly known as gaslighting; they will try to convince you that your perspective is wrong. They will somehow try to guilt you into thinking that everything bad that has happened is your fault. And you need to be very careful that you aren’t susceptible to this tactic.