Love alone is never going to be enough in a relationship. Just because you love someone doesn’t mean that the two of you are automatically meant to be together for the rest of your lives.
Every single one of us will have a very specific path and the journey that we need to follow on our own. We all have different personalities and we each carry our individual traits, beliefs, principles, values, worldviews, perspectives, motivations, expectations, needs, insecurities, and so on…
Whenever you meet someone new who you happen to be romantically interested in or attracted to, you’re going to hope that they feel the same kind of attraction towards you. You’re going to secretly dream that they can share the same feelings as you. Unfortunately, that isn’t always going to be the case. And that’s a harsh truth that everyone must learn to accept.
But this isn’t just a scenario that takes place with someone you’re only meeting for the first time. Unfortunately, this disconnect can also take place between you and someone who you have been in a relationship for quite a while now. You have to remember that you are both dynamic human beings. The love that you have for each other is constantly changing. And sometimes, that change isn’t always for the better. Sometimes… it’s for the worse.
Just because you started off really well in your relationship doesn’t mean that things are going to stay that way throughout the entire stretch of the relationship. There will be times wherein you won’t really adjust well to one another. And whenever that’s the case, someone ends up being left behind. And the feelings aren’t really able to adapt and cope with the needs of the changing environment of the relationship.
You might have some very unrealistic expectations for your partner and your relationship. And whenever they find themselves incapable of meeting your conditions and expectations, you’re going to end up feeling dejected, disappointed, and undervalued. You’re going to question if there ever really was a connection between the two of you, to begin with.
Don't.
Publisert av Relationship Rules Onsdag 21. februar 2018
However, the truth might be that you aren’t just compatible as a couple at all. And whenever that’s the case, it’s completely moot to try to place the blame on a single party. It’s rarely ever anyone’s fault. Sometimes, incompatibility exists as a result of two people staying true to who they are. And no one can fault them for that. Incompatibility is always a big culprit in the growing dysfunction within a relationship.
And unless you’re interested in sentencing yourself to a life of perpetual pain and disappointment with someone you’re clearly not meant to be with, then it might be best to just let go and walk away. Sometimes, the only choice that you have when a relationship has turned sour is to just let it go completely.
You might feel like you are a genuinely strong and admirable human being because you are holding on to a broken relationship with all of your might. You might believe that if you give enough time and effort to your relationship, you would be able to bring it back to life. You might think that if you just give more of yourself to your partner, they will respond the same way and give all of themselves to you as well. And that’s definitely a strategy that is worth venturing into.
However, at the end of the day, you need to be able to recognize if your efforts are still worth it or not. You need to be able to admit to yourself if there is still a method to your madness or if it’s all just make pretend at this point. Because ultimately, if you just keep pouring more and more of your energy into something without getting any positive results, then you’re just wasting your time.
Instead of just trying to feed that dysfunctional relationship, perhaps it would be wiser to just pull the plug completely so that you would be able to rid yourself of the suffering and drama that you’re bringing unto yourself by staying.
You should always be willing to acknowledge that sometimes, the bravest, strongest, and the noble choice that you could possibly make in this situation is to let the love of your life go.
It’s so easy to become attached to the feelings that you might have had for someone. You can become too comfortable with the familiarity that you have established with this person that you’re just practically terrified at the thought of having to venture into any other reality. But at the end of the day, you can’t let your misconceived comfort keep you from cutting ties with someone you’re clearly not meant to be with.
Don’t be too afraid of being alone. Just because you’re alone doesn’t mean that you’re lonely. It’s much better to be on your own than to be in a relationship that won’t make you happy.
