You’re probably familiar with the idea of the “five-second rule” wherein you are still allowed to eat something that has fallen on the floor so as long as you pick it up within 5 seconds of it touching the ground. That’s a well-known “rule” that a lot of people talk about. But are you familiar with the “three-second rule”?
Well, if you aren’t, then it’s likely that you’re a girl. It turns out that this is a popular rule that is starting to gain traction in the world of dating men. And it’s a horrible indeed, no doubt about it. That’s why you should be aware of it so that you can put a stop to it whenever you pay witness to it.
The “three-second rule” is not just a shortened and stricter version of the five-second rule. It’s something that is much worse than that. It’s about a disturbing rule that a lot of guys are using today when they date women.
And they only ever employ this rule on first dates. It’s a rule that threatens the very idea of consent between two mature adults.
Waheed and her friend then turned to their other mutual friend named Rick and he gave his thoughts on the matter. He was the one who actually told them that this was a common practice among a lot of single men who were active in the dating scene. He taught them the proper terminology of the incident; the three-second rule.
And to their shock, he was actually very much tolerant and accepting of this dating technique. They couldn’t believe that they were friends with someone who could believe in such a horrid rule. He tried to justify his beliefs by saying, “Well if they aren’t into it, you stop right away, no bones about it.
But I find most of the women are. It makes them feel gorgeous if you show you can’t hold yourself back because they’re so sexy.”
What do you think? Is there actually some rhyme and reason to this rule? Is it justifiable if it turns out that most women are actually into it?
Or is it further proving the notion that so many people just don’t understand or respect the idea of consent these days? Well, if you ask for my personal opinion on the matter, I’d have to say that it’s the latter. And it’s rather unfortunate.
Based on the advice of Dr. Robert Glover, the author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Guide to Getting What You Want In Love, Sex, and Life, this rule is essentially only going to work on women who believe that “no” isn’t really an option for them.
He says that only those who aren’t aware of their rights and boundaries are the ones who tend to be okay with being treated in such a way.
He goes on to say, “In my experience, being nice does very little to attract women or turn them on. That doesn’t mean that women are turned on by aggressiveness.
Confidence, social status, and even some degree of dominance can be turn-ons, but this is not the same as pushing women for sex. While it may feel validating for some people to have a seemingly confident man express high sexual interest in them, I would think the three-second rule would only work on people who’ve been conditioned to believe they don’t have the right, or power, to say no.”
One of the world’s leading experts in the field of psychology of sexual violence against women, Jessica Eaton, says that pop culture and mainstream media have practically conditioned and desensitized society to believe that these kinds of rules are okay.
“In rom-coms, we often see a man who has a sexual interest in a woman who is not interested in him – whom he then pesters, turns up at her work, sends her gifts, and tries to change her mind, which is framed as ‘true love’ or a ‘real man’ going after the woman he loves,” she says.
“This leads to both men and women believing that men who pester them for intimacy, love, or sex are doing it because they really love the woman, and so consent boundaries become irrelevant.”
Regardless, if it turns out that a lot of men (and even some women) are actively using the “three-second rule” on first dates, then a change must take place. Sure, three seconds may not seem like a significantly long time to a lot of people. But it’s not really the length of the kiss that’s the issue here. It’s really all about being able to promote respect for one another’s bodies.