This isn’t necessarily something rare. In facts, it happens way too often in many different relationships. And even though it might seem really confusing and weird to you at the moment, you’re going to get a better idea of why this is so by the time you finish reading this article. You just have to make sure that you keep an open mind; and remember that you aren’t necessarily to blame for all of this – for everything that is happening to you and your relationships.
You meet someone and you feel like you really connect with him. You take a chance on him and so you decide to go out on a few dates. And everything goes well for a while. You think like this could really turn into something real. You think that this is something that you can really bite your teeth into; something that you can really take seriously. But then, just when you’re ready to take things to the next level, he hesitates. He backpedals. And you’re caught off-guard. He tells you that he’s on the fence; that he’s not sure if he really wants to move forward in the relationship with you. He’s not sure about what he wants at all.
And you’re just left dumbfounded. You don’t understand why he can have such a seemingly sudden change of heart. You hate that he put you in this position. But you also don’t know if you can blame him or not. You try to solidify things with him, but then he just shuts you off completely. He puts a halt to all of your plans. And it can leave you feeling very disoriented about everything. You are forced to go back on all of the things that you initially believed about your relationship. “I don’t really know what I want right now.”
These are words you never expected to hear him say; and yet here you both are. You have never felt more vulnerable in your life. And it’s weird because until he said those words to you, you were so secure about your place in the relationship. And here you are now: so uncertain about the future of your relationship – or even if you’re in a relationship at all. What do you do? Your initial instinct might be for you to end things right away. And that’s understandable. You don’t necessarily want to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t know if he should even be with you right? Well, things are more complicated than that. It’s not that simple.
You really need to take some time to think things through. You want to be able to think about the situation in a holistic manner. You don’t want to automatically react to everything without seeing the situation from all the angles first. Yes, your emotions are running high – but you still need to be able to let your logic prevail. You need to let your better judgment lead the way. If you’re feeling lost at the moment, then that’s okay. A lot of people would feel lost if they ever find themselves in your position also.
And that’s what this article is for. It’s going to help shed light on the situation; to help make you better informed about everything. It can be very confusing when you try to dissect what he has just told you. But usually, this is what he really means when he tells you that he doesn’t know what he wants in your relationship.
1. He wants you, but he doesn’t want a relationship.
He’s playing with you. He knows exactly what he wants; and it’s not a relationship. He just wants you for your body. That’s why he has been flirting with you so much. He just wants to lay with you. He wants to keep things purely physical.
2. He really is confused about what he wants out of love and relationships.
He might not know what he wants for real – and you have to be considerate of that. Some men get really intimidated with the idea of really getting serious with someone especially when they’re not sure if they want to or not.
3. He still needs more time with you before he can decide to take things further.
You have to consider the fact that he still isn’t ready to take things to the next level with you. Remember that we all operate at dramatically different paces. And just because you’re ready to take things further in your relationship doesn’t mean that he is going to feel the same way. If he tells you that he doesn’t know what he wants just yet, he just might need more time to figure out if he’s ready to really get serious with you. But you can’t wait for him forever either. So give him ample time, but don’t let him waste your time.