Do you really love your partner enough to be able to look them in the eye and have a serious conversation with them without it being awkward? Communication is a very important aspect of any modern relationship – and you always have to make sure that your communication game is on point with your partner if you really want things to last. And communication isn’t always going to be easy. In fact, a lot of the conversations that you’re going to have with your partner are going to be very difficult, serious, heavy, and awkward. And you’re going to have to find a way to have these discussions constructively and maturely if you want to have a shot at actually making things work with one another.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking that you can hide behind a computer screen when you talk about these difficult things with your partner. You have to make sure that you are able to have these difficult conversations in person. Yes, technology is amazing. It allows you and your partner to communicate despite time and distance. However, there are some conversations that can’t be had over the phone or a laptop. There are some conversations that just need to be had in person; some discussions that you need to reserve for face-to-face talks. You have to understand that science has already affirmed the fact that eye contact is a big part of maintaining strong and healthy lines of communication with your partner;
especially when it comes to conflict resolution and management. Psychologists have stated that when you hide behind a computer screen while you’re having difficult conversations can further escalate conflict and create a further divide between the two of you as a couple. Part of being able to really come together and hear each other out is maintaining healthy eye contact. There’s just something in maintaining eye contact that stimulates the mind of visually-oriented human beings. You need to be looking into another person’s eyes to really connect with that person; to establish a strong bond with that individual.
That’s the reason that a lot of people don’t really trust the things that they can’t see. You need to be able to look at your partner in the eye if you’re going to trust what they’re telling you. There’s a certain sense of uncertainty and uneasiness that arises whenever you are having a conversation with someone whose face is hidden from you – especially when it’s a high-pressure situation. You want to make sure that when you are trying to come together with someone; to meet someone halfway, you are within that person’s line of sight. You want that person to be able to look straight into your eyes so that they know that you’re being sincere and that you’re making a genuine effort to meet halfway.
The impersonal nature of resorting to text messages and computer screens can make trust hard to come by; and trust is essential in being able to bridge the gap between two human beings. There are higher chances of you escalating the tensions further when you don’t establish eye contact with the person that you’re talking to. Remember that communication is the foundation of any strong relationship – and it’s not really something that you can revolutionize. You always have to go back to basics. You always need to keep things simple: having a real-world conversation with someone you’re in love with. You don’t have to make use of any fancy devices other than your mouths and your ears.
You just have to be honest and sincere with one another as you’re discussing these things. And a lot of times, honesty and sincerity can get lost on people when it’s taken in the form of text messages and phone calls. Human beings are visual animals; we need to be able to coregulate our nervous systems. And so when we’re engaged in conflict with one another, we need to be able to see the people we’re in conflict with if we want to be able to find a solution together.
It all boils down to trust. You need to be able to trust the person that you’re with; and it’s so much easier to trust someone you’re looking at. You are able to gain a better sense of who that person is and how that person feels when they’re discussing with you. So the next time that you’re locked in conflict with the person you’re in love with, remember to keep things simple. Go to a private place where it’s just the two of you – talk things out.
