When someone has it in their personality to go off track then no matter how happy the home they live in is, no matter how much their partner loves them and honestly, just, no matter what they do to keep this person for themselves, it won’t work. If they have to cheat, they will cheat. It’s a matter of human nature. There is no guarantee about anyone’s intentions. Feelings, opinions, plans and most of all, as bleak as it may sound, a person’s love for you change. Hence, it is very important for people to understand that there’s only so much we do never to lose the person we love. As human beings, there’s just so much we have control over, and there’just so much that can be done.
A happy home, a loving, thriving relationship may make you feel like your boyfriend/girlfriend or spouse will never have a reason to go astray and they’ll never go anywhere, like, it won’t even cross their minds. Although this may sound concerning and disturbing to you, cheating never just happened out of nowhere. People don’t make the decision to cheat on their partner overnight. In reality, it’s something that has been lurking in their minds for a long time, and they give in to it the moment they are given a reason to or the moment when they seem just to find a reason to cheat even when they aren’t given one. Anyhow, there’s a chain of events and reaction that take place when someone cheats, and there’s always an explanation as to what happened and why.
Learning about the cheating nature of your significant other can break you, but it can crush you to your core when you felt that the two of you were in a perfectly normal and happy relationship. You may have thought there was no reason to doubt their intentions and their faithfulness. Even when people are in a good quality relationship where things are perfectly smooth, they can still be tempted to take the wrong road and cheat on their partner.
People don’t deserve to be cheated on when they have really loved and valued their partner an the, but it happens then need never kill themselves over the feeling that “maybe it was me” “maybe he/she just wasn’t happy.” Because that isn’t the case. Someone who wants to try new things will cheat even when the circumstances are nothing like those that will compel him to such a thing. Here’s why people in a happy relationship tend to cheat on their partners
1. They don’t know what they want
The cheat does not have clarity about what he/she wants. Some days they wake up next to you feeling happy and thankful, but other days, they spend their entire time daydreaming about how awesome things would be if they were single. People who have the proclivity to betray their partner will often feel trapped in their relationship even if it’s a happy one. They will go off wanting to try something new and different a.k.a cheating.
2. They think sexual infidelity doesn’t mean they don’t love you
For a cheat sexual loyalty and love don’t go hand in hand. They have ventured to confidently separate and detach sexual infidelity from love. They would think something along the line of “if I slept with so and so person, it doesn’t mean I don’t love you” “sure I’m having sexual relations with another person but I’m coming back to you every single time, hence, I love you. Problem solved”. If confronted about it, they will tell you they’re “just” having sex. But they’re heart really only belongs to you.
3. It’s all they know
If you find out that your spouse or your girlfriend/boyfriend has cheated on you, you need to know them sufficiently well to understand what really happened. I say that because cheating can be a learned behavior. It can be something the cheat thinks is okay, is excusable, is explainable, justifiable and doable. Maybe they have been conditioned into viewing cheating from that perspective. Maybe, a partner has ever seen his parents cheat in his life before. Perhaps, they come from a place where they have witnessed their friends or family become unfaithful, steer away from the course of a happy relationship to chose cheating, if they’ve seen couples engage in sexual infidelity- it is highly possible the idea that cheating alright has been instilled in their mind, it has become normalized and acceptable.
4. Boredom
This person is bored. They will succumb to the excitement of something novel like sleeping with someone new, even if they are generally happy. They want a new, a different kind of stimulation that isn’t coming from their own significant other. A person like that is bound to cheat on the person who loves them.
Talk to me
Do you agree? Talk to me in the comments below!
Wow all true details. How do we solve this.
I agree in my relationship it was a learned behavior. H his father even had a separate family.
It was ok because he always came home.
100% true guilty 🙋🏻♂️ 1000%
Agree with your list
There is no solution, just accept the fact and move on.😊✌️
If the cheater wants sexual relations and nothing else..why isn’t he/she trying to have it with spouse? And if not,, how can you love someone that doesn’t want to touch you intimately? Or..do you have sex with both? Regularly with spouse and once every 3 months with affair partner?
In my case, it was learned behavior. My mother was a cheater all her life. Also both my husband were serial cheaters.
After getting hurt, I learned to play the game and decided to stay alone and have it whenever I want it. I have a boyfriend a 66 years old I’m 50 and I have a sexual relationship with a 42-year-old. Strictly s*x, no cuddling, going out to dinners, etc..